About wofwofdoggy : A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself -Josh Billings
Dogs leave paw prints on our hearts... RIP Pancho
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Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, I happily told my parents that my boyfriend proposed to me last night. My dad's response? "Marry that goofy bastard and you're out of the will." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47158) - you deserved it (4334)
On 05/10/2013 at 7:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Sankt Gallen)
Today, my future father-in-law showed everyone a picture of his poop because it was "shaped like a banana." My fiancé's whole family thought it was funny and "looked more like a banana than last time." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36237) - you deserved it (3249)
On 05/02/2013 at 11:04am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my dog had her stomach pumped because she ate some cookies. The 100 cookies I made for a bake sale to be exact. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34446) - you deserved it (5255)
On 05/02/2013 at 8:50am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my creepy co-worker walked up and said, "You know, I was having sex with this girl last night, and I almost said your name." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37875) - you deserved it (2657)
On 04/02/2013 at 12:11am - work - by QuinnyZebrass (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I finally had the best sex I've ever had with this really hot guy I've been hanging out with lately. I thought everything was all well and good until he turned to me and said, "You know, your orgasm face kinda reminds me of Steve Martin, but in a good way." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36192) - you deserved it (5545)
On 04/01/2013 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by LadySteveMartin (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27294) - you deserved it (3079)
On 03/25/2013 at 3:18am - animals - by Apes (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38605) - you deserved it (14988)
On 03/19/2013 at 8:31am - intimacy - by fredo (man) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I asked a traffic cop if it was okay to park my car briefly in a Monday to Friday only parking spot, since it's Saturday. She politely replied I could. I came back less than ten minutes later, only to find a parking ticket stuck to my windshield. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27688) - you deserved it (11269)
On 03/16/2013 at 4:04pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I told my family I was divorcing my husband. My little sister asked if "we can keep him instead". FML
I agree, your life sucks (27073) - you deserved it (5253)
On 03/16/2013 at 11:51am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, my boyfriend still won't talk to me, after I caused him the "worst embarrassment" of his life in front of his friends. What did I do wrong? I joined their conversation and ended up confusing the fictional characters of Gollum and Yoda with one another. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13284) - you deserved it (44744) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 03/15/2013 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Centre)
Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. The movie was in 3D, and he couldn't help but notice it would be much cooler if you could feel what the characters did. He spent the next two hours slapping me every time the person in the movie did, claiming the movie would be "better". FML
I agree, your life sucks (27030) - you deserved it (4284)
On 03/13/2013 at 5:06pm - misc - by bruised - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding at the natural foods market. It's the first time I've seen a woman's nipple in over two years. I've been married for ten. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46826) - you deserved it (5651)
On 03/10/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by themouseman1212 - United States
Today, when I got home, my child had three bruises. My babysitter's excuse? "She hit me first". FML
I agree, your life sucks (40928) - you deserved it (3965)
Today, my girlfriend accused me of being a feeder, saying that's why she's been putting on so much weight. When I said it might be because she eats at McDonalds everyday, and that I was willing to start cooking low-calorie foods for us, she hit me. Then she went to McDonalds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34466) - you deserved it (3197)
On 03/10/2013 at 12:03pm - love - by Raiden (man) - United Kingdom (Barnsley)
Today, our dog jumped on the bed while my fiancé and I were having sex, and let out the most horrific fart. My fiancé, like a gentleman, held my nose closed while he continued banging me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37247) - you deserved it (7375)
On 03/10/2013 at 9:40am - intimacy - by cremyfrozentreat - United States (Florida)
Monday 17 June 2013
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