wizardatheart21

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wizardatheart21

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 February 1987 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1401
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About wizardatheart21 : i think fmls are funny, and i sometimes feel the need to make a witty remark. not often, though. nothing too fancy.

wizardatheart21's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of wizardatheart21's badges

wizardatheart21's favorite FMLs

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

by ohcrap / 08/02/2011 at 12:58am / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

by iwantmoney / 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm / United States (Ohio) / Money

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

by Username / 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm / United States / Love

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

by douglas / 07/17/2011 at 3:14am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML

by flipnazn / 07/15/2011 at 12:24am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, my mother started dating a man who insists people call him 'Panda'. FML

by butimarealbear / 07/13/2011 at 9:11am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized I have no life after I created a fake Facebook account, posted an insulting message on my wall, and then engaged in a vicious argument with it, just so I could impress my friends. FML

by jen / 07/08/2011 at 10:57am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

by Yoda / 07/08/2011 at 1:23am / United States (New York) / Geek

Today, my mother resolved to never visit McDonald's again. Not because of ethics or health concerns, but because they charged her for extra barbecue sauce. She bitched out the man in the drive-through for a good five minutes, while I sat awkwardly in the passenger's seat. FML

by AgentFreshers / 07/07/2011 at 7:07pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my birthday. I got a phone call from my high school bully, to remind me that he'll always be able to find me and do whatever he wants to me. He does this every year. I turn 34 today. FML

by Snurkles / 07/07/2011 at 8:19am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML

by Username / 07/05/2011 at 10:54pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to sift through hundreds of pages of legal documents. They were all written in Comic Sans font. FML

by chawlay / 07/05/2011 at 10:04am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to videotape his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML

by WasteOMoney / 07/03/2011 at 9:50pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

by Cowgirl_Up37 / 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML

by asianlover / 06/30/2011 at 3:24am / Finland (Western Finland) / Miscellaneous