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withered

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 2959
  • Number of comments : 79
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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withered's page activity

Visits<b>az3pic</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 5:35pm<b>Blade12337</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 7:47pm<b>wafflethekid</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 8:15pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:29pm<b>Tikwichka</b> - the 06/26/2010 at 12:32pm<b>Cuervo23</b> - the 06/18/2010 at 2:51am<b>crzyry</b> - the 01/16/2010 at 3:04pm<b>TheGuyOverThere</b> - the 01/13/2010 at 7:45pm<b>Candyholic</b> - the 01/13/2010 at 7:37pm<b>bullschewisam</b> - the 01/11/2010 at 3:47pm<b>dentinpalevo</b> - the 12/29/2009 at 10:42am

withered's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of withered's badges

withered's favorite FMLs

Today, my dogs broke through our electric fence, one of whom managed to get his collar off. I picked it up and, without thinking, went across the fence line. I screamed like a chihuahua being run over by a bulldozer. FML

#18378000
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10440) - you deserved it (33135)

On 11/28/2011 at 6:54pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML

#18374141
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29443) - you deserved it (8734)

On 11/28/2011 at 7:34am - misc - by Dani - Reserved

Today, my mom went through my textbook and sharpied everything that could be "pornographic." It's a high-school biology textbook. FML

#18369717
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28175) - you deserved it (1673)

On 11/27/2011 at 8:07pm - misc - by wow - United States (Texas)

Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML

#18364433
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37592) - you deserved it (3094)

On 11/27/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

#18239656
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15097) - you deserved it (52666)

On 11/13/2011 at 5:46pm - misc - by shootme - Canada

Today, my girlfriend has a new obsession: grabbing my junk and whispering in my ear the song, "Baby, Imma Be Your Motivation." Problem? I get an instant boner and she only does it in public, because it's "funny as hell." FML

#18189501
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37412) - you deserved it (7476)

On 11/07/2011 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by InstantHardOn (man) - United States

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

#18134142
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31296) - you deserved it (14675)

On 11/01/2011 at 10:36pm - intimacy - by HOe HOe HOe (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my dad walked in on me masturbating. All I could say was, "Uh I had an itch..." FML

#18100630
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16966) - you deserved it (30895)

On 10/29/2011 at 12:43am - intimacy - by me - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after a root canal, I went to the pharmacy for some pain killers. The cute girl behind the counter asked what I needed. When I opened my mouth to tell her, a wave of drool hurtled out and splattered on the counter. FML

#17952669
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31202) - you deserved it (3462)

On 10/10/2011 at 3:44pm - love - by maninpain - Kenya

Today, I decided to make home made french fries. I figured all I needed was potatoes and salt, right? Wrong! I also needed the fire department and an ambulance. FML

#17934685
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16615) - you deserved it (24129)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:36am - misc - by anonymous - Sri Lanka

Today, I found out the people I babysit for have a nanny cam. Problem is, when I'm there, I act out scenarios in which I have the sweetest boyfriend. I also say his parts out loud in a man's voice. FML

#17932386
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12742) - you deserved it (39733)

On 10/08/2011 at 12:49am - work - by Laura - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

#17839732
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38219) - you deserved it (3142)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML

#17838831
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37257) - you deserved it (7013)

On 09/26/2011 at 11:35am - intimacy - by Oops (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend, the girl I completely love, is now dating my father. She tried giving me the "I know I'm not your mother..." speech. FML

#17823429
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52830) - you deserved it (2664)

On 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML

#17803016
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35437) - you deserved it (4921)

On 09/22/2011 at 6:31am - love - by nicole - Reserved



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