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wildflower1298

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wildflower1298

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  • Number of visits : 117
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50 favourites

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wildflower1298's favorite FMLs

Today, I was riding a bike when a truck accidentally hit me. The handsome driver came out and asked if I was alright. I said, "I am now" and winked. He said "Eww, no" then immediately ran away and drove his truck around me. FML

#20724353
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39855) - you deserved it (25085)

On 06/13/2013 at 9:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had to pee in my cat's litter box, just to avoid witnessing my mom having sex in the living room on my way to the bathroom. FML

#20702750
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72576) - you deserved it (5800)

On 06/03/2013 at 1:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, as I was getting out of my car, an old and obese lady walked up to me and called me an "inconsiderate heartless bitch" for using the last handicap parking spot. I guess she didn't see my wheelchair. FML

#20698730
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59920) - you deserved it (2937)

On 06/01/2013 at 2:21am - misc - by regstl - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

#20613218
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49531) - you deserved it (8072)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was again turned down by a potential host family on a student exchange site. Their reasoning was basically that since I'm American, I might do something to endanger my health, get hurt, and then sue them over my own stupidity. FML

#20602754
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42732) - you deserved it (12483)

On 04/18/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by thanks, my fellow americans - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

#20584918
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50499) - you deserved it (10849)

On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, thinking I was alone at work, I did an impression of Goldar from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I turned around to find out I wasn't alone; a cute girl was staring at me, unimpressed. FML

#20582957
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26885) - you deserved it (18583)

On 04/09/2013 at 10:44pm - work - by Goldar - United States

Today, my English teacher used the word "interpretate" again. This isn't the only mistake she's made though; I've been so frustrated that I've started a list of them. It's over a page long. I'm meant to be learning things from this woman. FML

#20582580
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31957) - you deserved it (3676)

On 04/09/2013 at 7:09pm - work - by Annoyed Student - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I announced to my family that I got accepted into Harvard. My grandma laughed and muttered, "Liar." FML

#20567796
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37606) - you deserved it (2824)

On 03/31/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I came home to visit my family for spring break, only to realize that I'd left my phone in my apartment. After a 2 hour drive back, I discovered my boyfriend with my neighbor. He panicked and pretended to be sleepwalking. FML

#20567746
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49702) - you deserved it (3565)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Maybe I'll stay longer than spring break. - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

#20566988
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20342) - you deserved it (51070)

On 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by fuck you dad (man) - Ireland (Monaghan)

Today, a cute guy who works at the mall winked at me. When I met up with my boyfriend, I bragged to him about it. His response was, "Don't flatter yourself, he winked at me too." FML

#20550170
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31604) - you deserved it (15944)

On 03/18/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by amberrenee91 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML

#20544356
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38923) - you deserved it (5675)

On 03/15/2013 at 1:44am - misc - by fmlman - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML

#20542468
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38705) - you deserved it (3777)

On 03/13/2013 at 7:22pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend drove me back home. My dad was sitting on the porch in his underwear, with his shotgun in his lap. He stroked the gun, looked my boyfriend dead in the eyes, and slowly shook his head. Now my boyfriend refuses to see me for his own safety. FML

#20538482
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34649) - you deserved it (3836)

On 03/10/2013 at 6:37pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)



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