Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (the 07/06/2014 at 12:05pm) | Search for a member
About whoracle : I feel like shit. But at least I feel something.
The loneliest moment in someone's life is when they are watching their whole world fall apart, and all they can do is stare blankly.
I think that people who get offended by words are idiots. If you get offended, get offended by what people mean, not what they say. Choice of words is a completely separate issue.
Quando il gioco è finito, il re e il pedone vanno nella stessa scatola.
Every path you choose will lead to equal disappointment
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Today, after doing vigorous chores all day with my girlfriend, her mom came and paid us each $100. My girlfriend cried and threw a fit because she said they were her chores, so she deserves all the money. FML
Today, my ex boyfriend got into a physical fight with the guy I've been casually seeing for 9 months. Afterwards, they had a beer, a long chat, and decided this was my fault and I wasn't worth the drama. FML
Today, I decided to try LSD with a few friends in a safe environment. As an artist, I had planned to spend my trip doing psychedelic paintings and had all my supplies set up. Apparently I spent most of my time in fetal position muttering about the "evil easel" and never even touched my canvas. FML
Today, I watched TV in the early morning. I was watching The Ring, and when the scene came on where the girl is crawling out of the TV, my dad grabbed my shoulders from behind me out of nowhere, causing me to shriek like a little bitch. I don't know how long he waited to do that. FML
Friday 31 July 2015