whitetrashed

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whitetrashed

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 28 July 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1192
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About whitetrashed : (silence)

whitetrashed's page activity

Visits<b>caranina</b> - the 11/16/2011 at 6:48pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:38pm

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whitetrashed's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned the only job that actually wants me is as a peanut butter factory worker. I've been unemployed for 9 months. I'm also allergic to nuts. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2011 at 3:49am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML

by Almostfunny / 03/16/2011 at 9:01am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I flipped out when I saw a centipede. I screamed, very loudly and in a very high voice. My girlfriend came into the room, stomped on it, picked it up and threw it in the trashcan. I apologized to her for the scene and all she said was, "I'm used to it." FML

by thenotsomanlyman / 03/07/2011 at 11:17am / United States / Animals

Today, I was in class when someone came in with a rose for me. My teacher made me read the card aloud: "I'm breaking up with you, happy Valentine's." It was from my boyfriend. FML

by sexyredhead / 02/14/2011 at 1:14pm / United States / Love

Today, I found out that even though my sister and I are identical twins, I'm known as "The ugly one". FML

by 5minsolder / 02/07/2011 at 8:21pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up and stepped out of bed right into a pile of dog crap. Acting quickly, I jumped on to my other foot, which would have been a great idea, except for this morning there were two piles. FML

by unknown / 02/04/2011 at 3:11am / Animals

Today, I accidentally ran over a squirrel on the road. I was late for work so I didn't stop. Later, someone keyed the word PETA into the side of my car. FML

by riddick0846 / 12/12/2010 at 2:29am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I wanted to try my mom's new lipstick. I opened it, baffled, examined it carefully. That's when it started to vibrate. Obviously, that wasn't a lipstick. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2010 at 12:11pm / Belgium (Brabant) / Intimacy

Today, my teacher turned around from the blackboard and screamed, "Stop chewing your gum like a cow!" That wasn't so bad.--The bad part was when she realized it was me, she apologized saying, " I am sorry. You are not really a cow. I don't want to traumatize you; you're just overweight." FML

by teach / 11/14/2010 at 2:31am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend was talking with his friends about how long girls take to get ready (hair, make-up, etc.). I said, "I never spend a long time getting ready..." He then looked at me and said, "maybe you should." FML

by ILoveFML / 08/29/2010 at 10:14am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my girlfriend's father offered her $10 to stop talking to me. I don't have a girlfriend anymore. FML

by hAHAha Halo / 08/02/2010 at 1:55pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Love

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML

by thanksmom / 07/19/2010 at 8:23pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad found and read my diary. Most of the entries were about how my father didn't respect my privacy. Then he phoned my aunt and read her passages from it. FML

by ugh / 06/05/2010 at 7:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was wearing a shirt that had a picture of a squirrel and acorns with a caption reading "Protect Your Nuts". My dad walked up to me, read my shirt, then punched me in the balls. FML

by squirrel / 01/09/2010 at 12:01am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got diagnosed with a condition that expresses itself in the form of violent diarrhea whenever I get nervous. Now I am constantly nervous about getting nervous about anything. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2009 at 9:36am / Sweden (Norrbottens Lan) / Health