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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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whenpigzfly

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whenpigzfly
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11107
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Today, I finished a 50 page term end thesis essay on the history of Russia. Looking over the final requirements once more, I find I made just a tiny little mistake. It was supposed to be a thesis on "Prussia". The paper's due tomorrow. FML

#6580357 (189)

I agree, your life sucks (20945) - you deserved it (25234)

On 12/03/2009 at 4:08am - work - by WTFFAIL (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got my first acting part. I played the role of a bad boy who has to grab the leading lady's ass, who then slaps me in the face. The ass grab was done in one take. The slap required 14 takes. FML

#6570901 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (28032) - you deserved it (3265)

On 12/02/2009 at 6:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, at my work, I was ringing though a kid's purchase. I try to be friendly with the kids and when he handed me his cash I said "Thank you, sir!" in a playful manner. He then turns to his mom and says "Mom, why does everyone think I am a boy?". FML

#6291314 (81)

I agree, your life sucks (21046) - you deserved it (3838)

On 11/13/2009 at 7:09pm - kids - by DeeElleGee (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a free temporary tattoo of a scorpion in a packet of potato chips and decided to wear it on my wrist. Whilst I was in the shower, I got a shock, thinking it was a spider. I then lost balance and slipped, banging my head on the faucet. FML

#6050280 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (7052) - you deserved it (26894)

On 10/29/2009 at 1:15am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I discovered I was at the same restaurant as my ex and his new girlfriend. Quickly, I picked up my mother's phone when she wasn't looking, and began to pretend to talk to a fake new boyfriend. Few seconds later, the waiter loudly asked me if I was done talking into the calculator. FML

#5865096 (86)

I agree, your life sucks (6056) - you deserved it (27657)

On 10/17/2009 at 12:25pm - love - by Ohgreat (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year old son came up to me and asked if he can "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereals. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML

#5560413 (124)

I agree, your life sucks (25714) - you deserved it (2611)

On 09/30/2009 at 1:17am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I went to eat with my girlfriend, her parents and my mother. My mother complained about every aspect of the service. When I told her she needed to assert herself, she took her pocketbook and hit me over the head. The whole restaurant stared at us while she yelled "Is that assertive enough?" FML

#5544276 (73)

I agree, your life sucks (23216) - you deserved it (4278)

On 09/29/2009 at 7:31am - misc - by User06606 (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out the reason my clothes have been smelling a little funny isn't because I sweat heavily, it's because of the dead rat in the back of my dryer. FML

#5541455 (49)

I agree, your life sucks (31016) - you deserved it (3489)

On 09/29/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally found out that someone had stolen my debit card and maxed it out. The good news? Whoever it was forgot to change the address on the card, so everything they bought online has been shipped to me. The bad news? I've received 16 snuggies so far, and I'm still counting. FML

#5529870 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (33776) - you deserved it (2173)

On 09/28/2009 at 4:36pm - money - by SnuggieOverload (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, during our championship field hockey game, my mouthguard fell into a mass of geese poop. The referee made me put it back in my mouth. FML

#5451406 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (39137) - you deserved it (2914)

On 09/24/2009 at 6:10pm - work - by ewewew (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had a stressful day at work and decided to go in the jacuzzi. I hadn't used it for a year, so it was a little dirty. After I cleaned it, filled it up, and jumped in, I pressed the jets. Immediately, thousands of dead moths shot out at full speed towards me. FML

#4927406 (178)

I agree, your life sucks (43969) - you deserved it (9667)

On 08/30/2009 at 11:23am - misc - by mel (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML

#4874486 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (37839) - you deserved it (4639)

On 08/28/2009 at 12:41am - kids - by mariokarter (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I got home from work, and saw a note on the counter my roomate left saying "Sorry about the basement." I then went into the basement, and found that it was flooded. My TV, Xbox360, mini-fridge, and couch were all destroyed. Good thing he tried to stop the leak with scotch tape. FML

#4856467 (88)

I agree, your life sucks (35257) - you deserved it (1407)

On 08/27/2009 at 7:51am - misc - by buzzzzkill (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend and his parents met my family. My grandpa thought it would be funny to walk around with a realistic gun and make references about being in the mafia. The rest of my family went along with it. FML

#4782445 (184)

I agree, your life sucks (29815) - you deserved it (3565)

On 08/24/2009 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I threw a party while my parents were gone. I forgot that our alarm automatically turns on at 11 pm, so when people opened the door, it went off. I couldn't find the number for the alarm company, so the cops showed up. Everyone started cheering because they thought they were strippers. FML

#4646350 (80)

I agree, your life sucks (8016) - you deserved it (35094)

On 08/19/2009 at 1:13am - misc - by Life of the party - Sent from mobile version