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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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we5leyz

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we5leyz
  • Town/Country : Staten Island, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 30 March 1987 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 2742
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About we5leyz : www.WesleyEng.com
AIM: we5leyz

I just got out of my 3 years and 4 months enlistment contract with the Army. I just turned 22 and the whole reason why I even joined is to fulfill the requirements to be NYPD. It was either going to be 60 college credits or 2 years active duty. I recently took the NYPD Medical Exam and they told me to come back at a later date with my medical records from the Army, because they were worried about a back injury I developed in Iraq. I may have just wasted 3 years and 4 months of the youngest years of my life. Fuck my life...

we5leyz's last visitors

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we5leyz's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

#16661334 (305)

I agree, your life sucks (9222) - you deserved it (41275)

On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had to be the one to break it to my daughter that WWE fighting was staged. She began crying. However, last month she didn't shed a single tear at her grandmother's funeral. FML

#16655787 (259)

I agree, your life sucks (28353) - you deserved it (3625)

On 06/14/2011 at 2:08am - kids - by mk (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out the reason my boyfriend had been encouraging me to send him 'personal' videos was so he could sell them online to porn websites. FML

#16646185 (350)

I agree, your life sucks (36138) - you deserved it (12712)

On 06/13/2011 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by secretpornstar - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML

#2812014 (269)

I agree, your life sucks (73318) - you deserved it (13613)

On 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by NoBalls (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

#2799622 (1233)

I agree, your life sucks (31589) - you deserved it (473812)

On 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm - misc - by I_Am_The_Edge (man) - United States (California)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494 (859)

I agree, your life sucks (85939) - you deserved it (50905)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I busted my ass to help this old lady move her stuff because she was going to a nursing home. I was told I would get paid. When I finished four hours later the lady took me to a room and told me to pick out anything in her little goody bag. I got a race car as payment. FML

#2766394 (218)

I agree, your life sucks (39869) - you deserved it (6272)

On 06/10/2009 at 7:03am - work - by person (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a guy from my school came into my work. I knew him but forgot his name. I didn't want to be rude and ask for his name when he probably expected me to know it. So, thinking I was clever, I said "How do you spell your name again?". His name was Rob. FML

#2734791 (177)

I agree, your life sucks (9764) - you deserved it (37411)

On 06/09/2009 at 2:44am - misc - by purrtygirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

#2722142 (287)

I agree, your life sucks (69765) - you deserved it (14572)

On 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by OhGeez (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I found out my mom paid my best friend $20 to be my friend when we were 10. FML

#2699534 (162)

I agree, your life sucks (88922) - you deserved it (3805)

On 06/07/2009 at 7:15pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to the Verizon because my phone was broken. It hadn't rang in 3 weeks. I hadn't gotten any text messages either. So, I got to the store they check out my phone. They told me that there was absolutely nothing wrong with my phone. No one had called me in 3 weeks. Then they charged me $30. FML

#2337784 (217)

I agree, your life sucks (48952) - you deserved it (24175)

On 05/27/2009 at 9:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I dreamed that I met this beautiful girl at a restaurant and we ended up having lunch together. Everything was going perfect until the end when I tried to get her number and she wouldn't give it to me. I can't even get a girl in my dreams. FML

#2335998 (105)

I agree, your life sucks (44935) - you deserved it (4450)

On 05/27/2009 at 5:48am - love - by xpxp2002 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was on webcam with someone and the conversation died so I said "brb". I sat there for five minutes not realising I had left my webcam on. FML

#2334865 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (5713) - you deserved it (53771)

On 05/27/2009 at 3:11am - misc - by Arrgh (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I felt left out that all my friends are getting married or have great relationships and my boyfriend won't commit. I made a facebook up and pretended to talk with this really cute guy I made up. Today, I found out that my boyfriend is gay... he started hitting on my made up facebook guy. FML

#2330424 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (48927) - you deserved it (13669)

On 05/27/2009 at 12:06am - love - by sounfair90 (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, while playing The Sims 2, I realized I had a virtual person's whole life planned out, and have nothing planned out for myself. FML

#2282395 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (15727) - you deserved it (32964)

On 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm - misc - by drurbanXVII (man) - United States (Florida)