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wdfcrystal

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wdfcrystal

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 18 May 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1834
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About wdfcrystal : Hi hi hi hey hey hi hi hi hi hey hi hey hi hi hey hello

Ok goodbye. 

wdfcrystal's page activity

Visits<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 07/30/2012 at 12:50pm

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wdfcrystal's favorite FMLs

Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML

#7379683
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33475) - you deserved it (3203)

On 01/16/2010 at 3:19pm - health - by dire-rear (woman) - Singapore

Today, I gave my wife her anniversary card. She started to giggle then walked in our bedroom and came back with the exact same card from last year. This is the second time I've done this. FML

#6881233
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8460) - you deserved it (30787)

On 12/22/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by todayJman03 (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend's crazy ex, who let herself in with her old key. She screamed at me to get out of "her" bed, snatched "her" blanket off of my body, and finally dragged the bed itself out the door. I was still in it. FML

Today, I texted a somewhat overweight girl I wanted to hook up with and asked her "Have you been dating anyone lately?" Unfortunately with predictive text, "dating" came out as "eating". I didn't realize it till after it sent. FML

#6761205
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16961) - you deserved it (27539)

On 12/15/2009 at 3:32am - love - by Proof-Reader (man) - United States (California)

Today, I left work to find a note on my windshield that read, "I think you're cute," with a phone number written down as well. I got super excited and immediately dialed. The phone was answered by a woman laughing hysterically. It was my Mom. FML

#6716817
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34611) - you deserved it (6051)

On 12/12/2009 at 12:23am - love - by MarkTheShark (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my greatgrandpa came over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, he pooped himself. My family went through the rest of the meal acting like we hadn't noticed to avoid embarassment. As it was coming to an end, my sister came home and immediately yelled, "Ew! Did someone poop?" He cried. FML

#6676147
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43165) - you deserved it (2667)

On 12/09/2009 at 2:39am - misc - by PoorGramps - United States (Texas)

Today, my very traditional grandmother has decided it's time for me to get married to Kevin. She's called half the town and informed them of the good news. I'm 17. I've never met Kevin. FML

#6580570
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41283) - you deserved it (1988)

On 12/03/2009 at 4:47am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I realized that I'm a sleepwalker and for the past week, that dream where I was giving my roommate a blowjob was real. He just pretended it never happened. FML

#6494612
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30332) - you deserved it (4520)

On 11/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by chacha - United States

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

#6472262
386 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7269) - you deserved it (80391)

On 11/27/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by obsessed (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I helped an old man with his groceries, because he was struggling and he had a cane. After, I was nice enough to drive him home. He went to thank me by giving me a kiss on the cheek. Then he stuck his tongue out, and tried to French kiss me. FML

#6402525
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34651) - you deserved it (5611)

On 11/22/2009 at 8:53am - misc - by mjperfetti84 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I thought my online boyfriend was calling me, so the first line I said was "Hey, Baby." His wife answered with, "This is Jenny. Who's this?" After speaking for thirty minutes, I found out he's married, fifty-eight, and has two kids. I'm seventeen. FML

#6352873
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12559) - you deserved it (64964)

On 11/18/2009 at 10:09am - misc - by omgitserika - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my dad and his new "girlfriend". A couple days ago I realized that my sexy clothes that my boyfriend had bought me for our anniversary was missing. Guess who was wearing it? FML

#6161509
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20851) - you deserved it (1735)

On 11/05/2009 at 12:06am - intimacy - by Meggie - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that whenever a mistake is made at my work, my boss assumes that it was me, unless indicated otherwise, but he has never said anything to me about it because of my 'learning disorder'. I don't have a learning disorder. FML

#6078927
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26973) - you deserved it (2206)

On 10/31/2009 at 1:20am - work - by Brinty (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it was my wedding day. I gave a speech about the first time my wife and I met. I said I knew she was the perfect woman for me and it was love at first sight. I looked to my right as she stormed off and then realized I had told a story about my ex-girlfriend who was sitting in the crowd. FML

#6042161
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9028) - you deserved it (83190)

On 10/28/2009 at 5:22pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while shopping for some bananas at my local grocery store, an old woman came up to me and started rubbing my stomach. She simply asked when I was due. I am a 43 year old man with a beer belly. FML

#5978415
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33948) - you deserved it (13748)

On 10/24/2009 at 6:24pm - misc - by fmlifetime (man) - United States (Texas)



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