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watchme
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1855
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About watchme : Hi I'm Cate :)

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watchme's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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watchme's favorite FMLs

Today, I started charging my phone in the car during a family road trip. The car recognized my iPhone as an MP3 player and started playing the audio from the porn video I watched before we left. Everybody heard. FML

#20443608
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9850) - you deserved it (37255)

On 01/05/2013 at 11:16am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, my wife is pregnant and sick. She switches from sobbing she's sorry for that, to blaming me for "doing this to me." On top of that, I have half her symptoms now: throwing up and crying for no reason. This will be a long 9 months. FML

#20443596
153 comments

Today, I unknowingly used my shampoo thinking it was leave-in-conditioner. While walking to work, it started to rain. I started to produce suds. FML

#20443594
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9288) - you deserved it (22040)

On 01/05/2013 at 10:59am - misc - by nomegusta (woman) - United States

Today, my uncle keeps spamming me on Facebook with friend suggestions. Most of them are people he met on porn sites. FML

#20443243
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15890) - you deserved it (1478)

On 01/05/2013 at 12:37am - misc - by tftm - United States (Illinois)

Today, when I got home I noticed a statue of a gnome sitting next to the door. I've had an intense phobia of gnomes since I was a child, and I can't bring myself to walk past it. It's been half an hour and I'm still standing outside. I can see my dad through the window laughing and waving. FML

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband reacted by going out and smoking weed, then getting completely shitfaced, and having his buddies drag his nearly-comatose carcass back home from a strip club. FML

#20442898
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20761) - you deserved it (4079)

On 01/04/2013 at 7:56pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, while on a first date with a charming guy, I excused myself to the bathroom. I tried to bring my purse along, since my pads were in there, and mother nature was calling. He vehemently insisted that I leave my purse, in case I was planning on stiffing him on the bill. FML

#20442878
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21998) - you deserved it (2076)

On 01/04/2013 at 7:33pm - love - by but i make different stiffies (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I learned that my doctor lost all of my immunization records. I can't start law school without them. FML

#20442687
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20885) - you deserved it (1317)

On 01/04/2013 at 3:51pm - health - by bureaucratic assfuckery (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had a fight with my boyfriend over a girl he is close to. He later arrived with flowers for what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were for her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML

#20442364
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21351) - you deserved it (5966)

On 01/04/2013 at 9:08am - love - by damn (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend called me anti-social. To prove him wrong I texted one of my friends. She texted back, "Who's this??" FML

#20442068
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18520) - you deserved it (6977)

On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

#20441551
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23640) - you deserved it (4926)

On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had to download a parental block so my dad would stop watching porn on my laptop. FML

#20441386
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24740) - you deserved it (1757)

On 01/03/2013 at 7:34pm - misc - by Tooyoungforthis (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, someone sent my boss a CD full of documents for an upcoming trial. It's my job to sort through the evidence, so he gave it to me. I looked on the CD. There's only one file; a 1020-page PDF of all the documents we need, and the pages weren't scanned in order. FML

#20441300
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24118) - you deserved it (1238)

On 01/03/2013 at 6:36pm - work - by fucked five ways to friday (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to take a shower. Afterwards, I noticed I'd forgotten to bring a shirt to change into, so I put on a towel and went back to my room, only to witness my 14-year-old brother and a friend smelling my bra, commenting on "how warm it is". FML

Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML

#20440379
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10623) - you deserved it (38789)

On 01/03/2013 at 5:34am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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