[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

wasted0087

Search for a member

wasted0087
  • Town/Country : Medard, Germany
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 1 August 1993 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 1780
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About wasted0087 : I write poetry - wasted0087.deviantart.com - also msn is wasted0087@hotmail.com Yes I'm 16 ain't nothing wrong with it, I'm part American Part German and Part Prussian, and no i'm not in Germany because I'm part German/Prussian.

But really... If you have any question just ask me don't ponder about it, just ask.

wasted0087's last visitors

raphanneZebideesugarnspiceezwinger35Zebrasofa13katiboodiirty_brunetteboopityboppityLilmonsonxxprettypink786

wasted0087's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

wasted0087's favorite FMLs

Today, my schlong decided to enter Mortal Kombat with my pants zipper. Guess which of the two won a flawless victory? FML

#9133208 (337)

I agree, your life sucks (20524) - you deserved it (5172)

On 03/16/2010 at 2:55pm - health - by liu_kang - United States

Today, I found out how mature the guy I'm seeing is. After sex, he took the condom off and hit me in the face with it. FML

#8889344 (212)

I agree, your life sucks (19559) - you deserved it (4174)

On 03/07/2010 at 9:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I realised my girlfriend is the perfect woman for most men. She only ever talks to me in the intermissions on Modern Warfare 2; shame it's not me playing. FML

#8614078 (253)

I agree, your life sucks (16210) - you deserved it (3791)

On 02/24/2010 at 12:27pm - love - by sadf4x0r (man) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)

Today, I was sitting down in a store when a stroller stopped by me. While the parents were fixing the strap, the baby looked at me, gasped, looked at me again, gasped, and then screamed. Ten minutes later, another baby looked at me and screamed. My face scares babies. FML

#8488357 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (21316) - you deserved it (2471)

On 02/20/2010 at 7:03pm - kids - by Scaryman (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while playing Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, my phone rang, and I instinctively tried to pick it up with the Force. I kept trying until it stopped ringing. FML

#8480132 (57)

I agree, your life sucks (3708) - you deserved it (27448)

On 02/20/2010 at 2:04pm - misc - by analinguist (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while in bed with my game obsessed girlfriend, she told me I was a "noob" in bed. FML

#8455591 (284)

I agree, your life sucks (11225) - you deserved it (3845)

On 02/19/2010 at 8:47pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend joined a group on Facebook called 'Swallow. Or it's going in your eye.' Today I also found out that my boyfriend takes Facebook groups very seriously. FML

#8439216 (199)

I agree, your life sucks (12738) - you deserved it (2845)

On 02/19/2010 at 9:27am - intimacy - by kit_kat14 (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I got a reply to my Valentine's Day card that I sent to my girlfriend. I'll get the address right next time because her neighbor is really creeping me out now. FML

#8435520 (39)

I agree, your life sucks (5761) - you deserved it (12258)

On 02/19/2010 at 3:25am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

#8409963 (60)

I agree, your life sucks (13023) - you deserved it (2558)

On 02/18/2010 at 3:08pm - love - by gp28 - United States

Today, I was at McDonald's. I bumped into a guy, and as I was helping him pick up his food, I realized he was cute. I began smiling and I was about to introduce myself, when he began laughing and said ,"It's you! I've heard about you!" He left laughing. I still don't know who he is, or what made him laugh. FML

#8397954 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (19999) - you deserved it (2108)

On 02/18/2010 at 1:38am - misc - by Lizzielollipop816 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while serving a rather large party at the restaurant where I work, I mentioned that the soup of the day was "to die for". After the hosts gave me weird looks, it dawned on me that the reason they were wearing all black is because they've just come back from a funeral. FML

#8372297 (107)

I agree, your life sucks (15434) - you deserved it (7445)

On 02/17/2010 at 11:32am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realised the only guy who is showing any slight interest in me is a Nazi-obsessed psychopath. He uses lovely pick up lines such as "Hey, do you know how much it hurts to staple your hand?" FML

#8368269 (162)

I agree, your life sucks (18414) - you deserved it (1616)

On 02/17/2010 at 5:49am - love - by LoveDrug (woman) - Ireland

Today, my grandmother decided to tell me about her past as a prostitute. In full detail. FML

#8365042 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (14317) - you deserved it (1488)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:40am - intimacy - by thatssickkk - United States (California)

Today, I found out the reason my boyfriend asked me out was because the fortune ball app on his iPod told him to. FML

#8364969 (118)

I agree, your life sucks (16439) - you deserved it (2178)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:38am - love - by amireallyloved - United States (California)

Today, I found out my cousin - who suffers from bipolar disorder - shot herself in the chest and has only a 20 percent chance of living. I told my boyfriend, while crying, and he held me for a few minutes. As soon as I got quiet, he pulled out his iPhone and started playing a shooter game. FML

#8364770 (316)

I agree, your life sucks (27688) - you deserved it (2464)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:30am - love - by lynn (woman) - United States (Texas)