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vvtumblesbee

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vvtumblesbee
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 April 1986 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 20718
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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vvtumblesbee's favorite FMLs

Today, I was woken up at 3:00 am to the sound of a tape recording of a baby crying, loudly. This has been going on for 3 nights, non stop. Why? because I brought up the subject of having a baby with my wife. Clearly, you can see where she stands. FML

#12241266
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31534) - you deserved it (10719)

On 08/01/2010 at 4:45am - kids - by kfoehslfns - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got a XXX wax, because my boyfriend wouldn't go down on me as he didn't like the hair. Now he won't sleep with me at all because I look like a child with no pubic hair, and he "feels like a pedophile." FML

#12201100
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34386) - you deserved it (8980)

On 07/30/2010 at 2:45am - intimacy - by hairless (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I dropped my phone in water, and my friends told me to put it in rice to draw out the water. They put my phone in riceroni. My phone now smells like chicken and has rice seasoning stuck all over it. Needless to say it still doesn't work. FML

#12198521
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11865) - you deserved it (27906)

On 07/30/2010 at 12:40am - misc - by rosesareyellow - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was wearing my yoga pants for my boyfriend. He's infatuated with them. He claims they make my ass look nice. I found out it's because I constantly get a camel toe, and it gives him a semi every time he sees it. I found this out by listening to him and his father at dinner. FML

#12110057
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27663) - you deserved it (9207)

On 07/25/2010 at 8:42pm - intimacy - by cameltoeyourface (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, when my girlfriend woke me up, she said, "I just had the sexiest dream." Thinking she was feeling frisky, I started to try to fool around with her. She pulled away and said, "Well it wasn't about YOU." FML

#12100553
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31652) - you deserved it (4907)

On 07/25/2010 at 7:09am - intimacy - by girlgirlinsanity (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was walking down the street and spotted a man who was about 6 and a half feet tall passing by me. As he passed me, I turned and asked him "How's the weather up there?" He then turned around, spat on me, and replied "Raining." FML

#12099804
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10611) - you deserved it (105620)

On 07/25/2010 at 5:06am - misc - by spriggs (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML

#12082068
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16358) - you deserved it (66351)

On 07/24/2010 at 6:53am - misc - by GirlishMan1883897 (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

#12030730
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22663) - you deserved it (46066)

On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, I came home to my boyfriend wearing one of my pads on his hand, because he didn't want to pay to go to the hospital for stitches. FML

#12022109
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24848) - you deserved it (3406)

On 07/21/2010 at 9:52am - health - by blank - United States

Today, I took my driving test for the first time. The instructor stopped it after less than ten minutes, and insisted she drive back to the test centre "in the interest of public safety." FML

#12000759
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9673) - you deserved it (32920)

On 07/20/2010 at 9:33am - misc - by Speedy (woman) - United Kingdom (Durham)

Today, while driving through town, I was distracted by a pretty girl walking on the nearby pavement and accidentally rear-ended the car in front of me. Not only did the pretty girl witness the crash and give a statement, it turned out she was a very feminine man. FML

#11999440
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11509) - you deserved it (41490)

On 07/20/2010 at 6:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I moved into my new apartment and met my new roommate. Immediately after shaking hands he suggested that we make a "masturbation schedule" to avoid any awkward situations. Way to avoid an awkward situation. FML

#11994829
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32451) - you deserved it (2823)

On 07/20/2010 at 12:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was cutting the grass on my riding mower. I spent a good 3 hours working on it. When I finished, I got off and went to take a look. It looked the same as when I started. I then realized that I hadn't lowered the mower part. I spent 3 hours just driving around. FML

#11986372
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15411) - you deserved it (58189)

On 07/19/2010 at 4:48pm - misc - by Dumbfounded - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out I've been incorrectly sorting thousands of papers for the past two weeks. My boss wanted them sorted by date, but the co-worker who instructed me said to sort them into alphabetical order just to watch me fail. FML

#11927489
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33692) - you deserved it (2821)

On 07/16/2010 at 7:48pm - work - by MSURebel70 (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my 23-year old boyfriend is not talking to me because I bought the regular kind of macaroni and cheese instead of the cartoon kind. FML

#11923673
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30225) - you deserved it (15995)

On 07/16/2010 at 3:45pm - misc - by liz - United States (California)



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