Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

vvtumblesbee

Search for a member

vvtumblesbee
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 April 1986 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 19715
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

vvtumblesbee's last visitors

Joe9024holagurl15ryan0712crazycookiecrBadLuckDude12345Claytonioomad_hatter0666amanda0318coolsunshinebear

vvtumblesbee's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

vvtumblesbee's favorite FMLs

Today, I thought I was giving a woman the orgasm of a lifetime until I realized that she was telling me to stop pulling her hair. FML

#3826
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7561) - you deserved it (29050)

On 01/30/2009 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by Hubris - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I got in a huge fight with my mom. So, I went to my room and locked myself in there and played loud music so I didn't have to hear her. She then decides to yell at me over facebook. Shortly after, I log out of Facebook. She then starts yelling at me on Yahoo. Damn technology. FML

#3491
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7915) - you deserved it (15873)

On 01/29/2009 at 7:45pm - misc - by blarg - United States (Illinois)

Today, I almost had an orgasm. Unfortunately, he had one first. FML

#3084
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41250) - you deserved it (5336)

On 01/28/2009 at 1:36pm - intimacy - by karma - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got bored on the toilet and decided to paint my nails. I ended up having to wait half an hour to wipe. FML

#2738
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5101) - you deserved it (47789)

On 01/26/2009 at 8:17pm - misc - by crazyvulva9216 - United States (California)

Today, I woke up and it was Monday. FML

#2635
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31087) - you deserved it (6970)

On 01/26/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by buddy - United States (Michigan)

Today, I made a Craigslist ad looking for hot and horny women that wanted some. I only got one reply, from another guy asking me if this kind of thing actually works. FML

#2475
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (2655) - you deserved it (23275)

On 01/24/2009 at 6:52pm - misc - by Farva - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend told me that my feet smell. He was in the next room at the time. FML

#2293
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10257) - you deserved it (4648)

On 01/23/2009 at 7:04am - love - by sadass - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML

#2256
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50296) - you deserved it (6943)

On 01/22/2009 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by TheEnglishOne - United States (California)

Today, I broke the glass of the photocopier trying to photocopy my ass. My boss will be here in five hours. She'll know it was me. I'm the only night guardian. FML

#1986
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3512) - you deserved it (26911)

On 01/21/2009 at 5:03am - work - by Wititipwitpwit - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was jerking one off and my cat jumped out of nowhere and dug his claws into my shaft. Attempting to knock him away resulted in three nasty gashes... that I now have to explain to my wife. FML

#1752
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26443) - you deserved it (6891)

On 01/19/2009 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by stanDman - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I slipped on a banana peel in a store parking lot as I was getting out of my car. I landed on my ass. The cops that were parking behind me later informed me that I would be able to see the video on youtube. FML

#1741
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15388) - you deserved it (1221)

On 01/19/2009 at 11:49am - misc - by vixenscars - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend offered a blow job, but my hair got stuck in her braces so instead we tried to pull them all out. And no, I didn't get any. FML

#1678
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21357) - you deserved it (8617)

On 01/18/2009 at 10:20pm - intimacy - by gjh - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was naked in bed. I was eating vanilla yogurt and it spilt. My dad walked in and then apologized that he had walked in on me while I was masturbating. FML

#1395
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13230) - you deserved it (6353)

On 01/16/2009 at 5:10pm - misc - by stellarshaun - United States (California)

Today, my mom asked me for advice on how to give a good blow job. I'm a guy. FML

#1389
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26641) - you deserved it (1577)

On 01/16/2009 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by Ohai - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my portfolio manager called me and said he had invested all of my retirement in Circuit City. FML

#1021
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25969) - you deserved it (1945)

On 01/13/2009 at 5:06am - money - by Noname - United States (Virginia)



Max Grünfeld's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Worst Sisters Ever
  • Growing up with a sister can be a good thing. If you're a guy, it can teach you about girls and how to interact with them so you won't grow up to be a sexist idiot who's afraid of women and who can only…

Monday 17 June 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on:

© 2008-2013 by