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vvtumblesbee

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vvtumblesbee
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 April 1986 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 20689
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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vvtumblesbee's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my car covered in shaving cream and tampons and the word CHEATER written on my windshield in lipstick. The guy a few doors down from me in my dorm has the same car as me. I'm a virgin. FML

#10643
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39832) - you deserved it (1778)

On 02/05/2009 at 5:34pm - misc - by CB4 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I sent my best friend Mike the link to a porn site we were talking about at a party. Turns out the name "Mom" is right next to "Mike" in my contacts list. FML

#9718
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12293) - you deserved it (44804)

On 02/05/2009 at 10:39am - intimacy - by menerethrr - United States (Virginia)

Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidentally sent it to my dad and got a text back saying, "You definitely take after your mom." FML

#9520
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31764) - you deserved it (55617)

On 02/05/2009 at 9:09am - intimacy - by ruffrider (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML

#9438
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43972) - you deserved it (13048)

On 02/05/2009 at 8:23am - animals - by #201 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I turned on my camera to find pictures of my dad's secretary giving him a blowjob. Minutes later, I hear a scream from another room as my 12-year-old sister discovers similar pictures on HER camera. Mom and dad say it's no big deal. FML

Today, I was taking the elevator down with a group of people. It stopped on the 2nd floor and I said "What asshole can't take the steps from the 2nd floor?" Then a kid in a wheelchair got on. FML

#6517
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5408) - you deserved it (41452)

On 02/03/2009 at 3:30pm - misc - by j0natron (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after a late night at a bar, I stepped into my building's elevator with a Chinese man who was carrying a plastic bag. Without thinking, I said, "Oooh, are you still delivering?" His response was, "I live here." FML

#6479
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6040) - you deserved it (45167)

On 02/03/2009 at 2:57pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New York)

Today, I found out my girlfriend's password for okcupid is "i_love_mike". My name is not Mike. FML

#5894
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23948) - you deserved it (2352)

On 02/03/2009 at 3:49am - love - by 751920 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I spent $400 at the stripclub and got 4 phone numbers. I as walked out of the club, I noticed it was tranny-night. FML

#5857
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6955) - you deserved it (34567)

On 02/02/2009 at 11:42pm - money - by bluntedone (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I tried to befriend the lonely boy who sits at the end of my table at lunch. He always sleeps or does homework during lunch. I walked over to him, tripped, and spilled my open bottle of water on his jeans. I apologized profusely and wiped off his pants with napkins. He got hard. FML

#4106
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27281) - you deserved it (9386)

On 01/31/2009 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by brighteyes - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I thought I was giving a woman the orgasm of a lifetime until I realized that she was telling me to stop pulling her hair. FML

#3826
10 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7696) - you deserved it (29668)

On 01/30/2009 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by Hubris - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I got in a huge fight with my mom. So, I went to my room and locked myself in there and played loud music so I didn't have to hear her. She then decides to yell at me over facebook. Shortly after, I log out of Facebook. She then starts yelling at me on Yahoo. Damn technology. FML

#3491
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8786) - you deserved it (19571)

On 01/29/2009 at 7:45pm - misc - by blarg - United States (Illinois)

Today, I almost had an orgasm. Unfortunately, he had one first. FML

#3084
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46622) - you deserved it (6385)

On 01/28/2009 at 1:36pm - intimacy - by karma - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got bored on the toilet and decided to paint my nails. I ended up having to wait half an hour to wipe. FML

#2738
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5917) - you deserved it (57126)

On 01/26/2009 at 8:17pm - misc - by crazyvulva9216 - United States (California)

Today, I woke up and it was Monday. FML

#2635
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36216) - you deserved it (8881)

On 01/26/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by buddy - United States (Michigan)



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