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vordhosbn

Offline (the 09/28/2014 at 8:55pm) | Search for a member

vordhosbn

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  • Number of visits : 6156
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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vordhosbn's page activity

Visits<b>Aisuchu</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 12:36am<b>Cherryta</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 3:32pm<b>mikaellikestacos</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 12:45pm<b>ShazzRandom</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 10:18pm<b>CAMAR0kid93</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 2:25pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:51pm<b>spanelli</b> - the 12/15/2010 at 11:40pm

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vordhosbn's favorite FMLs

Today, I paid for someone else's pee so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML

#19520767
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8056) - you deserved it (62175)

On 04/24/2012 at 4:29am - work - by xharmonyx - United States

Today, I offered my phone number to the guy I've been flirting back and forth with all week. He said no. FML

#19497689
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20805) - you deserved it (3453)

On 04/19/2012 at 9:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had to explain to my neighbor that black people aren't all lactose intolerant. His eyes still bulge out every time I eat cheese. FML

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

#19482788
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30768) - you deserved it (2597)

On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was in the car with my daughter, when I narrowly missed hitting a car after running a stop sign. After she screamed at me and demanded to know what I was doing, I had to admit that I'd been daydreaming about David Bowie. FML

#19478782
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5312) - you deserved it (27798)

On 04/16/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by DJ Clitter (man) - United States

Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML

#19477663
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24613) - you deserved it (2927)

On 04/16/2012 at 8:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, late for work, I called my dad to see if he knew where my keys were. Turns out he'd taken them on holiday with him because they have a bottle opener on them. FML

#19466099
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23872) - you deserved it (1777)

On 04/14/2012 at 11:20am - misc - by keyless (woman) - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)

Today, my son had to call me from his school's principal's office because he was disrupting his health class by laughing whenever the teacher said "sex". My son is 16. FML

#19453519
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23830) - you deserved it (3638)

On 04/12/2012 at 12:18am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML

#19440536
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20530) - you deserved it (2427)

On 04/09/2012 at 11:50pm - animals - by Lee (woman) - United States

Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML

#19343644
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23270) - you deserved it (2973)

On 03/25/2012 at 7:59am - animals - by PicklesMcRaptor - United States (Florida)

Today, as I turned the shower on, I got covered in gravy. Turns out, my friends had unscrewed the shower head, filled it with gravy granules, then screwed it back on. FML

#19319473
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24689) - you deserved it (2776)

On 03/21/2012 at 7:46am - health - by J Rush - United Kingdom (Powys)

Today, I paid $50 on a haircut. Halfway through, I realized the hair dresser was drunk. FML

#19316785
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24030) - you deserved it (4477)

On 03/20/2012 at 9:33pm - money - by Alyssa - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at a concert and a man came up behind and started to grind me. I pushed him away. He came back and pissed on my leg. FML

#19315463
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28083) - you deserved it (3207)

On 03/20/2012 at 6:27pm - misc - by Laura - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, instead of waking up to soft sunlight creeping in the window or the gentle trill of birds, I was awakened by the sound of my dog vomiting all over my bed. FML

#19312851
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21571) - you deserved it (2386)

On 03/20/2012 at 7:57am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I woke up to the faint memory of being drunk enough to draw dicks on my own face in permanent marker. FML

#19312458
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5292) - you deserved it (28351)

On 03/20/2012 at 4:16am - misc - by argh (man) - United States (Texas)



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