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vordhosbn

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vordhosbn

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  • Number of visits : 6635
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>TheNiceOne</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 11:18pm<b>Aisuchu</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 12:36am<b>Cherryta</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 3:32pm<b>mikaellikestacos</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 12:45pm<b>ShazzRandom</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 10:18pm<b>CAMAR0kid93</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 2:25pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:51pm<b>spanelli</b> - the 12/15/2010 at 11:40pm

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vordhosbn's favorite FMLs

Today, a drunk man wearing a sandwich-board proclaiming that, "The end is nigh" threw some so-called holy water at me while bellowing, "It's what Jesus would've wanted" and that I should "repent for being an evil shite." FML

#19674357
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15138) - you deserved it (1734)

On 05/24/2012 at 6:39pm - misc - by Notasinner (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was messing around in computer class, when somebody called my name from the hall. Trying to be smooth, I tried rolling my chair backwards out into the hall. The wheels wasted no time jamming and sending me crashing face-first into the floor in front of everyone. FML

#19662501
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8269) - you deserved it (22394)

On 05/22/2012 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, it was my birthday, and I woke up to my dad telling me that we're going to Disneyland. Apparently, by "we" he meant him and my mom. They did, however, make a point to say "happy birthday" before they left. FML

#19648886
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31527) - you deserved it (1685)

On 05/19/2012 at 10:04pm - misc - by Schubey (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up early for an important team meeting I needed to attend. I washed, got changed, and sat down to eat breakfast... I then woke up again, an hour late and covered in cereal. FML

#19645294
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20893) - you deserved it (3923)

On 05/19/2012 at 4:03am - work - by themcdave - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, a friend who I hadn't seen in a while offered to give me a ride. I didn't really know how to give directions to my house, so when we had been driving for a while and it was getting awkward, I just pointed at a random house and pretended to live there. FML

#19621592
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9596) - you deserved it (34034)

On 05/14/2012 at 10:22am - misc - by Anonymous - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, I started the job of my dreams. Our first marketing meeting was an in-depth analysis of the phrase, "Haters gonna hate, potatoes gonna potate". I have a 5 year contract. FML

#19611170
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20476) - you deserved it (4085)

On 05/12/2012 at 10:36am - work - by picklet (woman) - Malaysia (Negeri Sembilan)

Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML

#19608158
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23020) - you deserved it (6025)

On 05/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by rongo12 (man) -

Today, I started a new job. I noticed all the beautiful women. Then I tripped on a cord running across the floor. They noticed me too. FML

#19605681
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16734) - you deserved it (5111)

On 05/11/2012 at 1:03am - work - by Brown345 (man) - United States

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

#19602885
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19933) - you deserved it (4584)

On 05/10/2012 at 3:14pm - misc - by Amy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to a party dressed as a zombie. Everyone admired my hilarious "zombie dancing". Those were my regular dance moves. FML

#19602686
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20101) - you deserved it (4678)

On 05/10/2012 at 2:10pm - misc - by tinydancer (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

#19586113
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29283) - you deserved it (4700)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by N (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I went to a river near my house. They have several swing ropes that you grab and then jump into the river. As I was about to let go of the rope, my leg got tangled and I was held underwater. My mom watched and laughed for a while before she came to help me. FML

#19585555
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19617) - you deserved it (2558)

On 05/07/2012 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML

#19584517
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26533) - you deserved it (2401)

On 05/06/2012 at 10:13pm - love - by gutted (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had a dream I was on the toilet taking the longest piss known to man. Unfortunately, it was partially true. FML

Today, I was petting my cat and I jokingly said out loud, "Oh, the pussy likes it rough? You like that, don't you?" My windows were open and I could hear the neighbors laughing. FML



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