Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

vladimir26

Offline (17 hours ago) | Search for a member

vladimir26

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1384
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 24 posted

About vladimir26 : Anime and Manga addict.
17 year old Otaku.
Book and tea lover.

vladimir26's page activity

Visits<b>RockyLovesARacer</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:12pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 7:18pm<b>bradix1186</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 2:48pm<b>vernk</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 1:23pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 10:24am<b>Orchard</b> - the 05/25/2013 at 6:51pm<b>NaN101</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 5:24am<b>JoeHallenbeck</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 11:17am

vladimir26's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of vladimir26's badges

vladimir26's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend got angry because I laughed when he asked me if he should retire from being a Pokemon Trainer. He was serious. He's also 21. FML

#20798065
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37811) - you deserved it (10380)

On 07/22/2013 at 6:14pm - love - by ihatepokemon (woman) - United States

Today, I couldn't move without people talking to me about the "Royal Baby". It's like it's actually going to have an effect on my life. FML

#20797431
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41084) - you deserved it (5860)

On 07/22/2013 at 11:58am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, while relaxing in a chair in a shop, a man approached me and said, "You have no idea how many times I've farted in that chair." FML

#20797188
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39791) - you deserved it (4151)

On 07/22/2013 at 7:49am - misc - by xXxXxTOBIxX (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, trying to be funny in front of some friends, I held my cat above my head Lion King style. The height must have made him nervous, because he shat on my head. FML

#20788265
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27894) - you deserved it (49767)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend insisted that I start calling him "Professor Fucktard" in the bedroom. He seems to be dead serious about it. FML

#20777932
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41680) - you deserved it (5323)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by O_O (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, during my family's traditional 4th of July weekend celebration, my water broke. I kept trying to tell them and asked them to take me to the hospital, but they couldn't hear me over the fireworks. They all just kept smiling and nodding. FML

#20767424
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48951) - you deserved it (2963)

On 07/06/2013 at 5:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband wanted to try anal for the first time. His attempt to sound romantic was him saying, "Open your buns, the meat is ready." FML

#20767385
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54858) - you deserved it (7737)

On 07/06/2013 at 5:21pm - intimacy - by hamburger - United States (Michigan)

Today, I poured my heart out to my now ex-girlfriend over the recent passing away of my grandmother. Her eyes glazed over multiple times, and when I said that I don't know how to cope with everything, her advice was simply, "Shotgun. Mouth. Blam." FML

#20766944
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49335) - you deserved it (4623)

On 07/06/2013 at 12:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Lithuania (Vilniaus Apskritis)

Today, my daughter asked me to get her razors. When my 19-year-old son saw them he asked what they were for, to which my daughter replied, "For my armpits." My son then said, "Girls don't grow armpit hair." FML

#20764467
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44563) - you deserved it (6298)

On 07/05/2013 at 12:59am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw my older sister for the first time in three years. We hadn't spoke since I found out that she was the woman my college boyfriend left me for. Unfortunately, our reunion was fueled by her two-year-old son's desire to meet his dad. My husband. FML

#20760666
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64637) - you deserved it (5183)

On 07/02/2013 at 10:39pm - love - by Jenn (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my cousin thought it would be cool to put a firecracker in an abandoned birdhouse. Before I could tell him not to, it exploded and about 30 wasps came after me like the wrath of God. FML

#20749556
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48671) - you deserved it (4601)

On 06/27/2013 at 12:27am - animals - by EpicJman2828 (man) - United States

Today, I had to go to therapy for my fear of cats. All the way there, my girlfriend kept making cat noises and scratching at me. FML

#20748338
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38758) - you deserved it (7562)

On 06/26/2013 at 12:42pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, while life-guarding in a 55+ community, I greeted a man by saying: "Good morning Sir!" He responded with, "Cut the shit kid, I'm not that fucking old." FML

#20746882
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38722) - you deserved it (5431)

On 06/25/2013 at 5:45pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mom confessed to me that she used to pluck my step-dad's butt hair. I hope the brain-gods delete this obnoxious mental picture. FML

#20746764
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34971) - you deserved it (2961)

On 06/25/2013 at 4:43pm - misc - by mymomplucksbutthair (woman) - United States

Today, I lost my car keys, so I asked my ex-husband if he still had his spare to my car. He said he'd send it. I got an empty envelope with a troll face on it. There's a reason I left him. FML

#20738006
120 comments


FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: