vladimir26

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Offline (the 06/28/2016 at 1:24am)

vladimir26

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4159
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

About vladimir26 : Anime and Manga addict.
19 year old Otaku.
Book and tea lover.

vladimir26's page activity

Visits<b>RockyLovesARacer</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:12pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 7:18pm<b>bradix1186</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 2:48pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 10:24am<b>Orchard</b> - the 05/25/2013 at 6:51pm<b>NaN101</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 5:24am<b>JoeHallenbeck</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 11:17am

vladimir26's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of vladimir26's badges

vladimir26's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm on vacation in Japan with my brother. When he said he could speak Japanese, I guess what he really meant that he's a dumbass weeaboo who only knows the words "kawaii", "baka", "sugoi" and a few others. He ended up offending two locals so much that they beat the shit out of us. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2015 at 1:16pm / Japan / Health

Today, I made it onto my boss's shit-list, after pointing out that he'd misspelled "customer" as "costumer" 6 times in his report, and "college education" as "collage education" twice. It'd be a dick move on his part even if making corrections like this weren't part of my damn job. FML

by anda1000douchesscourthispostformistakes / 09/16/2015 at 9:42am / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, I discovered that my 100-pound Rottweiler is absolutely terrified of (drumroll please) orange peels. Yup. A byproduct of my lunch will turn this hulking monolith with teeth into a whimpering puddle of pee. FML

by pansypup / 09/02/2015 at 10:30pm / United States (New Mexico) / Animals

Today, I agreed to stay a week with my wife's parents, who she told me were traditional Japanese. I was prepared for having to wear Japanese clothes while in the house, but I wasn't prepared for communal bathing in the same huge bath with her father, grandfather, uncle and two brothers. FML

by Alan / 09/02/2015 at 4:13pm / Germany / Miscellaneous

Today, I dyed my hair purple. I came out of the salon and a little girl walked past and said, "Wow, you look like a mermaid!", to which her mother quickly said, "No she doesn't, she looks like her parents don't love her." FML

by laurencoc / 08/31/2015 at 6:50pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Kids

Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2015 at 8:06pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I was going down on my boyfriend when he stood up on the bed to get a different experience. I started to get aggressive and pushed him up against the wall. I forgot our bed was on wheels and the bed started sliding away and his body slid down the wall. So much for being sexy. FML

by still laughing / 08/28/2015 at 5:48pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I was diagnosed with food poisoning for the third time since moving to this base in Japan. My husband keeps cooking questionable meat and vegetables from the commissary because he thinks the food from a Japanese grocery store is radioactive. FML

by ithinkimturningjapanese / 08/06/2015 at 4:33am / United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East) / Health

Today, my boyfriend gave me serious shit because I couldn't name 10 Pokémon. He said he even considered dumping me. Glad to know he has his priorities straight. FML

by KatzVKatz / 07/24/2015 at 5:51pm / Slovenia (Novo mesto Urban Commune) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got hit in the face by a ping-pong ball. It hit me so hard, it burst a big zit on impact. FML

by Anonymous / 07/04/2015 at 2:25am / Japan (Tokyo) / Health

Today, while swimming under water, my 80-pound lab thought I was drowning and tried to "rescue" me by jumping in after me, wrapping his front legs around my neck, and standing on my chest. FML

by Angel / 06/21/2015 at 10:16pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, I was invited to a fancy-shmancy charity event, and the host - my friend - told me to wear a long, ballroom, fancy gown. Turns out my friend was just being a dick and it was a pool party. I spent $200 on my hair and makeup alone. FML

by ssondik / 06/21/2015 at 8:50pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to sleep in the car, and when I went to rest my face on my fist, our car hit a bump and I ended up punching myself in the face. FML

by Bengemon825 / 06/20/2015 at 3:03pm / United States (Connecticut) / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML

by shmarf / 06/19/2015 at 12:17pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, as I finished my piano recital and took a bow, I farted into the microphone. FML

by fartypants / 06/18/2015 at 6:53pm / United States (Florida) / Work