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vikingsocks
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  • Number of visits : 32
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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vikingsocks's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28099) - you deserved it (1782)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

#20198547
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23435) - you deserved it (5526)

On 12/10/2012 at 12:10am - money - by hailey - United States (Maryland)

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

#20157750
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20341) - you deserved it (1470)

On 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today, I showed off my new tattoo to my friends. Too bad it says "Walk Earless" now instead of "Walk Fearless." That's right, I'm now supporting Van Gogh. FML

#18997714
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11960) - you deserved it (25379)

On 02/05/2012 at 12:54am - misc - by inked - United States (Alabama)

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38400) - you deserved it (3846)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

#17526799
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28102) - you deserved it (4424)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML

#16448607
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31996) - you deserved it (4043)

On 06/01/2011 at 7:53am - misc - by iscreamforicecream (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML

#12082068
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16359) - you deserved it (66351)

On 07/24/2010 at 6:53am - misc - by GirlishMan1883897 (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got mauled by a cat named Mr. Sprinkles. FML

#7989901
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22873) - you deserved it (4995)

On 02/07/2010 at 10:19pm - animals - by zzdug (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was walking through Macy's with my girlfriend. I stopped to admire a mannequin's ass, joking with my girlfriend like I was touching it. Then I slapped it. It wasn't a mannequin. FML

#408707
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39285) - you deserved it (183452)

On 03/17/2009 at 6:16am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (California)



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