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vettle

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vettle
  • Town/Country : Canada
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 February 1985 (28 years)
  • Number of visits : 1050
  • Number of comments : 452
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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vettle's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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vettle's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML

#20529387
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38120) - you deserved it (4755)

On 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm - misc - by parental failure (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

#20521872
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46555) - you deserved it (3137) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, after much coaxing, I finally got my roommate to loosen up and have a couple of beers with me and my friends. It was only later in the evening that he admitted the real reason he hadn't wanted to drink: he's an alcoholic and had been sober for six months, until now. FML

#20499970
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12090) - you deserved it (40774)

On 02/09/2013 at 6:26pm - misc - by mhmm... cumsquats (man) - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, I learned it's a bad idea to text and smoke while drunk, because there is an increased risk of throwing your phone off the balcony and sticking your cigarette into your pocket. FML

#20485916
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9348) - you deserved it (38816)

On 01/30/2013 at 5:13am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after much self-doubt and awkwardness, I learned that I look amazing in a little black dress. Now I have to figure out what I'm going to tell my wife. FML

Today, I almost died. How? I nearly suffocated after passing out while chewing an entire pack of gum. I should really drink less. FML

#20484025
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6070) - you deserved it (29182)

On 01/28/2013 at 11:23pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a pregnant woman got on the bus. There were no free seats, so I stood up to give her mine. An obese man pushed past her, waddled over, and oozed into my seat. I said it was for the pregnant lady. He called me a "sexist bitch" and claimed he needed it more. FML

#20478664
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36223) - you deserved it (1504)

On 01/25/2013 at 8:24pm - misc - by protoplasm stole my seat (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, my wife brought my 5-year-old daughter to visit me at the office. My boss has a speech impediment, and when she heard it, she exclaimed, "Hey my daddy can sound just like you! Show him daddy! Show him!" FML

#20454855
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15959) - you deserved it (28349)

On 01/12/2013 at 3:14am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw Les Misérables. I was singing along to one of the songs when the guy next to me dumped his soda over my head and told me to shut up. FML

#20447311
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13290) - you deserved it (82237)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:34am - misc - by maddiecat - United States (Missouri)

Today, while sharing a few beers on the couch with my boyfriend, he drunkenly uttered the fateful words, "Babe, if I could suck my own dick, you'd be single as HELL." FML

#20426492
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40209) - you deserved it (4395)

On 12/27/2012 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by well, i am now (woman) - United States

Today, my mom called me from jail. She was arrested for having sex in public. I was with my dad when I got the call. FML

#20135378
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37520) - you deserved it (1576)

On 10/27/2012 at 11:02am - intimacy - by Monkey (man) - United States

Today, it's the five year anniversary of the day I broke up with my girlfriend to see other people. I've not had sex a single time since. FML

#20134961
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7765) - you deserved it (38551)

On 10/27/2012 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Cslouth - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend found my list of women I've had sex with, complete with the ratings I'd given them. The list is in chronological order. She's not only not the highest rated, she's not last on the list. FML

#20024660
493 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6851) - you deserved it (107047)

On 08/16/2012 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

#19957248
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4467) - you deserved it (51354)

On 07/19/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

#19870672
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41994) - you deserved it (1590)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:48am - health - by Jobby (woman) -



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Monday 20 May 2013

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