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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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versailles

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versailles
  • Town/Country : Winter SPrings, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 19 June 1990 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 2700
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About versailles : college student. slacker trying to pass off as the hard-working over-achiever some people still hope/think i am. chronic procrastinator. thief. a work in progress.

versailles's last visitors

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

versailles's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my mom about how my friend is going to China for a year instead of college. My mom suggested that I could do the same. When I told her that a trip to China is probably more expensive than my college tuition, my mom replied, "Not for a one way ticket". FML

#4454040 (147)

I agree, your life sucks (32186) - you deserved it (4549)

On 08/11/2009 at 4:31pm - misc - by unwanted - Canada

Today, I went on an excellent first date. After the 'end of the date kiss' came "I suppose this is where I tell you that I'm married". FML

#3447565 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (44931) - you deserved it (3112)

On 07/03/2009 at 3:24am - love - by hannaholic (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML

#2855395 (405)

I agree, your life sucks (64131) - you deserved it (2230)

On 06/13/2009 at 11:13am - misc - by Toothy_Peg (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML

#2812014 (269)

I agree, your life sucks (73320) - you deserved it (13613)

On 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by NoBalls (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my cousin and I found out that when a girl puts a flower in the right side of her hair, it means she's available. The bigger the flower, the more available she is. My eleven year old boy cousin told me to "cut down a palm tree and put it in my hair". FML

#2671287 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (51227) - you deserved it (4535)

On 06/06/2009 at 8:38pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got an "Enlarge your penis" email for the millionth time. I was about to dismiss it when I saw the FW: from my wife. FML

#2527360 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (72706) - you deserved it (5140)

On 06/02/2009 at 8:19am - intimacy - by Ariel (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I went to donate blood for the first time. When they stuck the needle in my arm, I had a panic attack and begged that they take it out. The woman helping me told me she'd take it out in a moment and left. It was then that the Red Cross stole a pint of my blood while I had a panic attack. FML

#1674851 (210)

I agree, your life sucks (38189) - you deserved it (11634)

On 05/05/2009 at 8:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was looking at my recommendations on Amazon, which included several vibrators. Just a few days earlier I was looking at books on anger management. Amazon thinks I need to get laid. They're right. FML

#1297315 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (51930) - you deserved it (6342)

On 04/24/2009 at 6:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was playing guitar on the sidewalk and had my guitar case open for tips. A man came up with a folded piece of green paper, smiled and walked away. After I was finished, I looked at my tips. I unfolded the paper, it was a note that said "You suck!" FML

#1188952 (107)

I agree, your life sucks (34747) - you deserved it (8149)

On 04/21/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by Jesus (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was visiting my grandmother's house. She keeps the thermostat on 85 and after about 30 minutes I explained to her "I'm going to have to leave, it's just too hot in here". She replied: "You think it's hot in here, wait until you get to hell." I laughed. She didn't. FML

#993932 (162)

I agree, your life sucks (51477) - you deserved it (4264)

On 04/15/2009 at 3:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, half asleep, I dropped my pill before I could take it. I quickly picked it up and washed it down. Five hours later, I just found my pill on the ground. What did I swallow? FML

#948871 (200)

I agree, your life sucks (78788) - you deserved it (16017)

On 04/13/2009 at 12:12pm - misc - by anonymiss (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was really windy and rainy causing me to trip and knock into a little kid. While still gathering myself, I apologized and patted the kid on its' head. Then I see people around me starting to laugh. I turn and look at the kid, and discover I've been interacting with a trash can. FML

#832092 (152)

I agree, your life sucks (21263) - you deserved it (36508)

On 04/06/2009 at 7:47am - kids - by trashcanned (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while working at a Subway store right next to a big hospital, there was a big line of people all getting their subs toasted. Without turning around, I asked the next person in line, "I'll bet you want yours extra toasted?" She was a burns victim from the hospital. FML

#814481 (146)

I agree, your life sucks (30778) - you deserved it (56851)

On 04/05/2009 at 9:48am - work - by 00Evan (man) - Australia (Queensland)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I walked past a church with a bunch of people standing outside waiting for the bride and groom to walk out. When the church doors opened, I yelled congratulations as loud as I could. It was a funeral. FML

#811533 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (15666) - you deserved it (55754)

On 04/05/2009 at 1:20am - misc - by oops (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I saw a very attractive female police officer while at the DMV. Thinking myself suave, I asked her: "Is it sexual harassment if I tell you how beautiful I think you are, and ask for your phone number?" Apparently it was. FML

#786603 (356)

I agree, your life sucks (21101) - you deserved it (60245)

On 04/03/2009 at 6:05pm - misc - by ShamedJP (man) - United States (New York)