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Mobility
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Up and coming moderator
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18820) - you deserved it (3642)
On 12/11/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Devil (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, it's my birthday and my ex husband texted me at midnight to tell happy birthday. Too bad he couldn't have texted my new husband to remind him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20329) - you deserved it (3397)
On 12/08/2012 at 11:12am - love - by aerythia - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my friend and I told each other about our boyfriends. They're both nice, kind, beautiful, talented, funny, sweet and smart. They also both have the same name. And house. And job. And car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34116) - you deserved it (1971)
On 12/08/2012 at 5:44am - love - by ouch. - Canada (Yukon Territory)
Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me, and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15795) - you deserved it (1774)
On 12/07/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11049) - you deserved it (35913)
Today, my science class found out that I have OCD and that one of my rituals is to cough when others cough. This is going to be a long year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16897) - you deserved it (2455)
On 12/04/2012 at 11:09pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, my mom hung her new "Christmas Clock" on the wall. It plays a different Christmas carol every hour, on the hour. It's only December 2nd and I'm already starting to understand why suicide rates sky rocket this time of year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16264) - you deserved it (1476)
On 12/02/2012 at 11:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, in break from tradition, I proposed to my boyfriend. We were at a Japanese Pagoda. Water was trickling everywhere; the moment was perfect. While I was on my knee, after pouring my heart out, he looked wistfully out over the water and said, "So, I was thinking pizza tonight." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20972) - you deserved it (4206)
On 11/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by but I tried anal and everything (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I woke up and looked over to see the "beautiful girl" I slept with last night. Turns out it was the obsessive girl from my class with a man-face I had avoided all semester. In conclusion, beer goggles are very real and very powerful. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7263) - you deserved it (27839)
On 11/06/2012 at 12:15am - intimacy - by coolguy (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21992) - you deserved it (2326)
On 11/02/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by for fuck sake dad (woman) - Ireland (Limerick)
Today, multiple people admired my elaborate face paint. This happens every Halloween, at least every Halloween since I got badly burnt in a car accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35778) - you deserved it (1346)
On 11/01/2012 at 7:17am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull, City of)
Today, I was on a train. An elderly woman and her daughter got on, looking for a seat. The daughter suggested the one next to mine. The elderly woman looked at me and said something in Russian. I speak some Russian. She said she didn't want to "sit by the hooker." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14938) - you deserved it (2444)
On 09/18/2012 at 10:04am - misc - by dearbailee (woman) - United States
Today, I realized that my boyfriend really does have a problem with my upper-lip hair. I woke up this morning to him ripping a wax strip off of my face. All he could say after I stopped shrieking was that he had hoped it wouldn't wake me up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14822) - you deserved it (6244)
On 09/06/2012 at 5:50pm - love - by WaxOnWaxOff - United States (Colorado)
Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29539) - you deserved it (2910) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 08/02/2012 at 9:00am - love - by opinaise - France (Midi-Pyrenees)
Friday 24 May 2013
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