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vero11pm

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vero11pm

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  • Number of visits : 317
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vero11pm's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

#20428799
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22571) - you deserved it (44610) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/28/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by ELparano - Canada

Today, I woke up with an engagement ring on my left hand. The same one I refused last month. My boyfriend apparently waited for me to be drunk to propose again last night, and has already posted the pics on Facebook. FML

#20427625
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37644) - you deserved it (14351)

On 12/28/2012 at 10:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML

#20427288
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35813) - you deserved it (5061)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:49am - misc - by Ren - United States (Ohio)

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

#20427124
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38585) - you deserved it (7952)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States

Today, my girlfriend donated most of my book collection because she got me a Kindle for Christmas. Some were signed, including my Harry Potters. FML

#20427017
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55476) - you deserved it (3948)

On 12/27/2012 at 11:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28976) - you deserved it (7526)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

#20418714
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45640) - you deserved it (25118)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed and I asked him why he was with me. His answer was, "Well, the last girl I dated was really smart and she always made me feel dumb, so I decided to switch things up a bit. You make me feel like a genius babe." FML

#20417781
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37288) - you deserved it (7163)

On 12/24/2012 at 12:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I received a package from a local guy on Craigslist. Instead of the iPhone I paid $350 for, the box only contained a photo of an iPhone. The guy had been dumb enough to attach a return address, so my husband went over and beat the shit out of him. I now have to bail him out of jail. FML

#20416192
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40640) - you deserved it (11879)

On 12/23/2012 at 12:52pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, a guy professed his love for me in front of my friends. The guy is my first cousin. FML

#20414731
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37919) - you deserved it (3073)

On 12/22/2012 at 9:33pm - love - by Brittany (woman) - United States

Today, I was drunk at a party and confessed my love for my crush and told her how I felt. According to my friends, I made out with another girl not long after my confession. FML

#20412747
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10741) - you deserved it (44093)

On 12/22/2012 at 12:01am - love - by Stupid Drunk - United States

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

#20412240
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41674) - you deserved it (8165)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, it's my wedding anniversary; my husband forgot. My daughter gave me two beautiful long stem roses and said she would look after her sister while we went out to celebrate. My daughter is more romantic and thoughtful than my own husband. FML

#20410075
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35998) - you deserved it (3425)

On 12/20/2012 at 10:31pm - love - by igiveup (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, someone painted the "Dark Mark" on the side of my car. It won't come off and my kids refuse to get in because it means "a wizard died in there." FML

#20407286
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33014) - you deserved it (3604)

On 12/19/2012 at 9:59am - kids - by spellbound - Australia (Western Australia)



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