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vero11pm

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vero11pm

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  • Number of visits : 306
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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vero11pm's favorite FMLs

Today, I was drinking from a water fountain. I bent over to sip the water and felt a HUGE slap on my ass. Completely confused, I turn around to see some guy with a horrified look on his face. Apparently he thought I was his girlfriend. And then I saw his girlfriend standing behind him. Giving me the evil eye. FML

#7467735
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30316) - you deserved it (2395)

On 01/21/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28185) - you deserved it (6923)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in line at the grocery store with my 3-year-old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had on it a cow wearing sunglasses. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML

#6533285
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45572) - you deserved it (2967)

On 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm - misc - by annonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend's parents wanted to cook dinner for me. After a whole day of cooking up a storm, her parents cooked an elaborate meal of roast lamb, pork chops and grilled chicken. Rejecting a meal is like spitting in ones face in Chinese culture. I'm vegetarian. FML

#6500045
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32077) - you deserved it (12962)

On 11/28/2009 at 7:40pm - misc - by NickC (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I texted my brother saying "Always remember I love you! Never forget it!" to which he answered: "You better not be doing drugs." FML

#5933276
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24566) - you deserved it (8921)

On 10/21/2009 at 7:21pm - love - by Lovelysister (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally told my fiancé about the crippling sexual abuse I suffered through as a child. He immediately broke off the wedding. His reason? He can't marry someone who isn't "pure". FML

#5321781
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84787) - you deserved it (4201)

On 09/17/2009 at 9:36pm - intimacy - by Jackie (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I saw my girlfriend going into my best friend's dorm room and suspected her to cheat on me so I placed a camera in his room to spy on them. In the end, I discovered that my girlfriend has problems in math and both my best friend and brother are gay. FML

#4379475
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17298) - you deserved it (74882)

On 08/08/2009 at 3:18am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was sitting on the train and some crazy man started talking to me. I ignored him, and he tapped on my shoulder. He started blabbing and I just pointed to my ears and mouthed "I'm deaf." He stopped talking. A minute later my phone rang and I answered it without thinking. FML

#4181466
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8122) - you deserved it (68219)

On 07/31/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my 9 year old niece asked me if I was a virgin. I told her, "Yes, I'm saving myself until marriage". She replied, "That's a load of bullshit, you just can't get a guy!" Sadly, she's right. FML

#4025974
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48038) - you deserved it (8171)

On 07/25/2009 at 5:55am - kids - by Kimberly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while going through airport security the lady asked why I folded everything so small. I said that I was going away for a month and needed to fit a lot of stuff in only one bag. She smiled, nodded and then dumped my luggage to search for "drugs and other illegal teen things." FML

#3811279
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48207) - you deserved it (2790)

On 07/16/2009 at 7:39pm - misc - by search_me (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML

#3349914
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12943) - you deserved it (60399)

On 06/29/2009 at 11:01pm - misc - by ZZ - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while at football practice, my teammates and I were on water break. At the bus barn next to the field, a good-looking girl was washing a bus. Some of the guys started to yell pick-up lines at her from 50 yards away, and pretty soon I chime in. She turns around. It was my younger sister. FML

#3194809
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13511) - you deserved it (65204)

On 06/25/2009 at 1:02am - misc - by nail714 (man) - United States



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