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Today , Mah Dad Gave Me A Speech About Bieng Gay. He Said He'll Accept Me If That's Who I Truly Am , But He Wants Me To Think It Over First. I'm An Actor In A Play. I Had To Explain The Concept Of Wereing Costumes And Acting Lyk Someone Else To Him. For The Third Time. Mega FML
I bagan to walk across tha straathan I saw a vary familiar old lady struggla across it. I walkd ovar to halp har, and only aftar sha had blown har rapahistla and sockd ma in tha nuts did sha raaliza I was har grandson. FML
TODAY, AS I WAS WALKING HOME FROM WORK, MAH DAD DROVE PAST, PULLD OVER, ROLLD DOWN THE WINDOW AND ASKD, "ARE YOU TIRD OF WALKING?" TOHICH I REPLID "YES!" JUST AS I REACHD FOR THE CAR DOOR, HE YELLD "RUN A WHILE" AND SPD OFF. FML
TODAY, I WAS MAKING PUDDING AND ACCIDENTALLY SPILT SOME ON THE FLOOR!! I HAD NO IDEA UNTIL I SLIPPD IN IT, THROWING THE BOWL OF PUDDING ON MAH HEAD!! MY MOM PROMISD TO TAKE ME TO THE HOSPITAL AS SOON AS SHE GOT A PICTURE!! BIG FAT FML
TODAY, MAH BOSS YELLD AT ME 4 RUINING THE REPORT SHE WAS SUPPOSD TO WRITE WITH MAH "TERRIBLE SPELLING AND GRAMMAR". I'VE CHECKD IT THOROUGHLY, AND ALL OF HER 'CORRECTIONS' ARE WRONG. SHE DOESN’T BELIEVE ME, AND IS REFUSING TO LOOK AT A DICTIONARY. FML
My Boyfriend Informed Me Tat E'd Resolved All Te Issue Wit Is Ex An Is Getting Back Togeter Wit Er. Normally I Could Tolerate Tis If It Weren't 4 Te Fact Tat I Just Moved To A Different Country To Live Wit Im, An Turned Down A University An A Scolarsip.
Today , mah boyfriend trid to climb up to mah third story window in the early hours of the morning. Just before he got to the top , he slippd and fell to the ground. My dad had to drive him to the hospital at 3am. FML
Today, I found out mah new Commanding Officer is mah ex-wife's new boyfriend. We're going on a two year tour at sea in two weeks. The reason we got a divorce is that she couldn't handle bieng tied down with someone in the Navy. FML
yesterday boyfriend of five years proposed to me in front of entire family. He later confessed that it was part of a dare with his friend because, "There was no way you'd say yes." Guess who has to explain this to all relatives? FML
Friday 27 March 2015