About vengeance501 : Hey,
My name is Nick and I'm 16 years old. I like to read FML's for a good laugh and when I'm bored.
I live in Good ol' Canadia, eh. I like Hip-Hop and Rock. The movie Kick-Ass kicked ass. And Parkour is awesome. Msg me, I'm always up for a good convo. :D
About vengeance501 : Hey,
vengeance501's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
vengeance501's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/30/2014 at 5:51pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML
by Anonymous / 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm / United States / Intimacy
by BabeWithBrains / 12/08/2013 at 2:01pm / United States (Wyoming) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 6:56am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy
by NotTellingYouMyName / 11/28/2013 at 1:26am / United States (New York) / Animals
by Anonymous / 08/10/2013 at 12:02am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML
by JuggaloSlasher15 / 08/08/2013 at 7:03pm / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 08/08/2013 at 7:10am / Latvia (Jelgavas) / Health
Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML
by hardee fucking har yourself, sir / 08/07/2013 at 6:00pm / United Kingdom (Stockport) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was video chatting with my boyfriend and his friends. When I stood up, he told his friend "See, she's not a twig!" I jokingly replied with, "So I'm fat?" After a few seconds of silence, his friend yelled, "It's a trap!" and left the chat. FML
by ImNotFat / 08/07/2013 at 2:04am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/03/2013 at 4:14pm / Poland (Kujawsko-Pomorskie) / Intimacy
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML
by Notaplacetogo / 02/17/2013 at 1:45am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML
by nekkidness / 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/12/2012 at 7:58am / United States (Maine) / Intimacy
by bunnyluver4545 / 01/11/2012 at 12:42am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
- Today, my phone provider informed me that I had 12 messages waiting for me on my voicemail. Happy… Today, I’m on vacation in Peru in the Amazonian forest. I woke up in the middle of the night to the… Today, I’m a babysitter for a 4 year-old little girl. All afternoon, I attended Barbie’s murder and…