velvel

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velvel

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9194
  • Number of comments : 43
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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velvel's page activity

Visits<b>KyoshiroT</b> - the 10/31/2016 at 2:10am<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 3:49pm<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 10:04am<b>biggredd75</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 10:50pm<b>lungjiao</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 2:31pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 10:42pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 10:54am<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 4:13pm<b>just_a_person9</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 5:13pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 7:19pm<b>shebewoofle</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 11:46pm<b>mistykitten</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 11:10am<b>ratman775</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 7:05pm<b>KabamWolf</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 11:17am<b>WordBea</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 2:55pm<b>ahmadmuneer</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 12:31am<b>Dangerousreaper</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 3:11am<b>XmasaX</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 5:04pm

Fucked!<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 4:05pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 7:05pm

velvel's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of velvel's badges

velvel's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother said she called our internet provider, and told them to cancel it. In rage, I left for a friends house for a couple of hours. When I got home, she told me she was joking, and wanted me out of the house so she could eat all the ice-cream. FML

by Derps / 05/04/2011 at 5:11am / Denmark (Midtjyllen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sent a kinky text message to my boyfriend. Within minutes I got a reply of 'whoever this is, fuck off and give my girlfriend's phone back.' Apparently I'm so bad at writing sexy messages that my boyfriend thought it was a prank from someone who'd stolen my phone. FML

by ohtheshame / 05/02/2011 at 4:34am / Intimacy

Today, I found myself crying for an hour when my recreated crush on The Sims 3 game rejected my character and ran off with someone else. FML

by Nxydolli / 04/29/2011 at 3:34pm / United Kingdom (Durham) / Geek

Today, while being robbed, a man heroically chased down the robber and got my purse back. He then looked at the distance between us, turned the other way and ran off with it. FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2011 at 2:29am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, while my teacher was helping me with a problem, the gum he was chewing fell from his mouth and down my shirt. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2011 at 3:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was absentmindedly playing with a piece of lint. When I looked at it, I realized that I had been rolling and squeezing a dead spider in my fingers for about five minutes. FML

by scarred4life / 04/27/2011 at 10:05am / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals

Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML

by BadgerSpirit / 04/27/2011 at 9:35am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my husband got out of the shower, came downstairs naked screaming ''EMBRACE THE HARDNESS!!'' Little did he know, my step mother was sitting right there at the kitchen table. FML

by Scarlett / 04/26/2011 at 1:28pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat decided the most threatening thing in my apartment that absolutely needed to be attacked was my left nipple. FML

by cdn_steed / 04/23/2011 at 9:11am / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, my mom confused me with my dad. She got in the shower with me. FML

by Damian / 04/22/2011 at 7:11am / Intimacy

Today, my roommate told me there is some restricted number that keeps calling and waking her up at odd hours of the night. She then says she's getting the police involved to find out who it is because she feels "harassed". I'm the restricted caller calling to wake her up from snoring so loud. FML

by wowimscrewed / 04/14/2011 at 12:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML

by Sid / 04/09/2011 at 8:58pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was reading a blog post by a girl that I really like. In the post, it said, "I know I'm not beautiful." I told her that I thought it wasn't true at all. She responded by crying hysterically and asking me why I would say that. It turned out that it actually said, "I know I'm beautiful." FML

by Arran / 04/09/2011 at 8:24pm / United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent) / Love

Today, I finally found a reason to quit smoking. I threw my cigarette butt out the window and it blew back in, went down the back of my pants, and burnt my butt in 3 different places. FML

by Anonymous / 04/08/2011 at 11:30am / United States / Health

Today, a woman called my work and accused me of having an affair with her husband, my coworker, demanding that my boss discipline me. I don't know her, I barely know her husband, and I haven't had sex in months. FML

by kharrington / 04/07/2011 at 1:30pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy