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vegemute

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vegemute

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1884
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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vegemute's page activity

Visits<b>spork_of_doom</b> - 9 hours ago<b>davotesolono</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 11:35pm<b>notabeachbabe</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:55pm<b>football98</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:33am<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 1:53pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 1:02pm<b>dingostacy</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 3:42pm<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 11:11pm<b>Horsempeg</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 1:27am<b>belljars</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 5:00am<b>bigboi1992</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 3:40am<b>leeebeeeee18</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 10:11am<b>ironfey</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 8:13pm<b>atl904</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 9:53pm<b>jgwyh</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 11:51am<b>mesutozil11</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 12:45am<b>Dswank620</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 6:43am<b>edward80</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 9:19am

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vegemute's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad got drunk and thought it would be a great idea to clean up the yard by dumping gasoline all over the leaves and lighting our entire front yard on fire. FML

#18334271
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27558) - you deserved it (2258)

On 11/24/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by JWhite - United States (California)

Today, I was late for work. Trying to cut a few seconds off the clock, I tried to open my breakfast candy bar while taking a piss. I ended up pissing all over myself and dropping the bar in the toilet. FML

#17960824
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8877) - you deserved it (36497)

On 10/11/2011 at 4:53pm - misc - by Massasam - United States

Today, I was at a bar with my friend, when I noticed a young lad at a table near to us. I thought it'd be funny to jeer and flick peanuts at him. I went to the restroom, only to come back to my friend face-down on the floor. Turns out the guy fucked him up instead, and now he won't talk to me. FML

#17752221
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5607) - you deserved it (52845)

On 09/15/2011 at 5:22pm - misc - by Cooper491 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I met an old friend from high school and his hot girlfriend. I jokingly said she must be blind to go out with him. His response: "Yeah, she is." FML

#17728499
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18812) - you deserved it (32287)

On 09/12/2011 at 3:25pm - misc - by aru9 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

#17483730
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36830) - you deserved it (3460)

On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States

Today, my girlfriend was over at my house for the first time. I told her I had to go take a shower, and from the other room my grandmother yells "you're not going to jack off this time are you?" FML

#17261824
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33293) - you deserved it (8178)

On 07/26/2011 at 12:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to my friend's house because his family was having a move away party for him. Everything was going good until his dad decided to give a toast. Including an anecdote about how he walked in on us watching porn together. FML

#17250020
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27322) - you deserved it (9057)

On 07/25/2011 at 2:43am - intimacy - by best_friend - United States (Texas)

Today, a group of girl-scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought 2 bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML

#17172932
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40993) - you deserved it (6282)

On 07/19/2011 at 2:24am - kids - by hatemylife - United States (New York)

Today, I got home from work to find my house covered in graffiti dicks, the windows smashed, the front lawn entirely ripped up, and my letter box containing dog shit. I also found a note taped to the door saying, "Suck on this Darren". Darren is my next door neighbor. FML

#17063070
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57233) - you deserved it (2894)

On 07/11/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML

#16993109
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33708) - you deserved it (3606)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:54pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I saw a guy with a "free hugs" poster. Since nobody else was hugging him, I decided to. He had a boner. FML

#16886368
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22994) - you deserved it (37045)

On 06/27/2011 at 7:34pm - intimacy - by nomorefreehugs - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I snuck out to see my girlfriend in the middle of the night. When I got to her house, I decided to throw a rock at her window to wake her up. It broke a hole in the window. FML

#16075095
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10488) - you deserved it (44437)

On 05/07/2011 at 2:40am - misc - by Kaz (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I painted a kids room at my new nanny job while the dad "helped" by staring at my ass and telling me how hard it is to position your "junk" correctly when wearing a speedo. First day on the job. FML

#15865508
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37750) - you deserved it (3427)

On 04/20/2011 at 9:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML

#15426482
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47704) - you deserved it (27074)

On 03/22/2011 at 1:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML

#15207309
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40674) - you deserved it (3317)

On 03/05/2011 at 3:26pm - misc - by devinbyrne - United States (Texas)



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