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vegemute

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vegemute

12Fucked!

vegemutevegemute
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 March 1999 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4014
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About vegemute : Heyhey, my name is Jack. I'm a huge fan of survival (Survivorman is my favourite show) as well as science, history, music, cooking and travel, and I'd like to study medicine in future - Docbastard is my idol
I love meeting new people, so chuck me a message. :)

vegemute's page activity

Visits<b>thevelociraptor</b> - 23 hours ago<b>igoryok76</b> - yesterday at 10:46pm<b>sam882</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 1:27am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:14pm<b>luc887</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:52pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:33am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:15pm<b>Umbraelux</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 5:21pm<b>Miss_Chevious</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 10:07pm<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 5:18pm<b>WOTAN1488</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 2:48pm<b>EmmaRey</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 2:36pm<b>demonte_jones</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 9:16pm<b>Kelsey_R</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 6:29pm<b>Mar2171</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:09am<b>dewberry2001</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 9:51pm<b>balboa_2</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 11:34am<b>flyingmind</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 11:14am

Fucked!<b>thevelociraptor</b> - 17 hours ago<b>Kelsey_R</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 12:29am<b>dewberry2001</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 3:51am<b>flyingmind</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 5:14pm<b>lindacollins423</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 7:37am<b>xxtatumalyssaxx</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 1:49pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 7:24pm<b>echarlotte</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 12:48am<b>_lyricall</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 4:56pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 6:30am<b>alexlots</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 4:55pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 3:52pm

vegemute's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of vegemute's badges

vegemute's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML

#19633395
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22251) - you deserved it (3460)

On 05/16/2012 at 6:38pm - misc - by HK (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
480 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50565) - you deserved it (4720)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, my fiancée called our engagement off, because apparently she's actually a complete idiot who will believe anything that a slimy con artist tells her. In this case, a "psychic" who mumbled some shit about me having "a dark aura." FML

#19628029
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28626) - you deserved it (3426)

On 05/15/2012 at 4:56pm - love - by waste of effort (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39521) - you deserved it (4086) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML

#19615151
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8505) - you deserved it (43042)

On 05/13/2012 at 2:26am - work - by fired - United States (Oregon)

Today, a pigeon got into my apartment. After knocking over a very expensive vase, it panicked, rammed itself against a window, and shat all over the floor as it tried to get out. FML

#19611512
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21024) - you deserved it (1911)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:01pm - animals - by Eric Ngan - Singapore

Today, I got all my wisdom teeth out. Have you ever thrown up after mouth surgery? Stomach acid in your bloody gum holes is just as fun as it sounds. FML

Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it later, it had 20 comments on the picture. I was feeling good until I read the comments and looked at the picture again. I left my vibrator on the the bathroom counter. FML

#19609877
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11296) - you deserved it (58935)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Hunter101 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML

#19608230
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31680) - you deserved it (9726)

On 05/11/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by 504-A1 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while in the break room at work, I laughed at a co-worker's joke and started choking on my drink. My boss exclaimed in front of everyone, "We need to teach this girl how to swallow!" to everyone's childish amusement. Now they won't stop calling me Spit. FML

#19608060
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19846) - you deserved it (2645)

On 05/11/2012 at 5:23pm - work - by mel (woman) - United Kingdom (Bournemouth)

Today, I found out where all my missing panties have gone, when my 12-year-old daughter was caught selling them to the boys at school. FML

#19598679
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27862) - you deserved it (2942)

On 05/09/2012 at 6:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I went to the beach. While I was enjoying the sun, an old man with prosthetic leg and no clothes on sat next to me. He took off his fake leg and put it behind his head. Then he opened his legs revealing his "stuff." I will never unsee this. Ever. FML

#19595886
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25777) - you deserved it (2211)

On 05/09/2012 at 12:54am - misc - by aligator1009 - United States

Today, I accidentally kicked a can and it hit a man's shoe. He tried to kick it at me but his foot somehow failed to connect with the can. I could hear it rattling behind me as he failed again and again. So he decided to run up behind me and throw it at my head. FML

#19586621
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23810) - you deserved it (5529)

On 05/07/2012 at 10:08am - misc - by thepigeonsfriend (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

#19586113
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29466) - you deserved it (4715)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by N (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML

#19586096
365 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49491) - you deserved it (9327)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:42am - intimacy - by quirrus (woman) - United States



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