vanillacocoa

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vanillacocoa

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 30 April 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2424
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About vanillacocoa : Hi I like pies XD I like rainbows and muffins and unicorns and all sorts of crap you people call random these days. I don't care, im young and LOVIN IT

vanillacocoa's page activity

Visits<b>jasonrellet</b> - the 08/29/2016 at 2:19pm<b>captain_hero89</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 2:58pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 1:47pm<b>cats4lyfe</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 6:39pm<b>tatteredshirt</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 7:47am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 3:41pm<b>vadskimer</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 12:24am<b>EPKSPARTAN</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 1:54pm<b>Kjaerlighet</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 8:58pm<b>wiscbaseball</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 11:27am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 1:03am<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 10:05am<b>rabbiddog</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 9:32pm<b>ThuNDeY</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 11:28am<b>ShadyShroomz</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 3:29am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 9:26pm<b>Earthdforce</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 3:10pm<b>notabastardchild</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 2:39pm

Fucked!<b>cats4lyfe</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 12:40am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 9:41pm<b>notabastardchild</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 7:39pm

vanillacocoa's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of vanillacocoa's badges

vanillacocoa's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so out of it from a lack of sleep and an accidental antihistamine overdose, I tried to offer my cat a cup of tea, and actually got pissed off when he didn't reply. It took me a good five minutes to understand what just happened. FML

by anonymous / 06/20/2012 at 10:09am / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML

by kitty shah / 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out how my parents met. They met at a mental hospital, where they were both being hospitalized. FML

by fail / 06/15/2012 at 11:36am / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, it was my first time meeting my fiancé's parents. My future mother-in-law had cooked steak, hearing it was my favourite food. I somehow managed to bite my tongue, and then blurt out "F*ck!" just after she asked me how it was. FML

by perfectman / 06/12/2012 at 6:34am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, after a very painful mouth surgery, I went home to take a nap. Then my nose started bleeding, so I stuck a tissue in it and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was so high from painkillers that when I saw the tissue, I thought it was a ghost. I screamed so loud I burst a stitch. FML

by LaurenB / 06/07/2012 at 2:12pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Health

Today, I got a lecture about being lazy and not being active enough for my age, which ended with, "When I was your age, I was out every night having sex with anything that breathed." Thanks Gran. FML

by BrianTheLion89 / 06/06/2012 at 5:37pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was at work, reading some funny stories on my phone. Just as one of my co-workers decided to share that his father had passed away recently, I burst into uncontrollable, teary-eyed laughter at a story. They don't believe my explanation, and have branded me the office asshole. FML

by Anonymous / 06/05/2012 at 2:47pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Work

Today, my husband went nuts. He's quit his job and set out building an amateur bomb shelter in our backyard. According to him, there's "substantial evidence" that cannibalism is on the rise across the country, and that "it's gonna be like Resident Evil out there, babe." FML

by why... / 06/05/2012 at 1:21pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

by Scared / 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I finally summed up the courage to break up with my abusively controlling girlfriend. I don't know what I was thinking, but instead of leaving as a free man, I left as an engaged one. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm / Italy (Lombardia) / Love

Today, I admitted to my parents that I have an eating disorder. Instead of trying to help, my mom stared at me and said, "Duh". FML

by Hungrey / 05/28/2012 at 9:38pm / United States / Health

Today, I texted my friend and asked her what her sad status on Facebook was about. She texted me back saying her step-mother had passed away. I tried to reply with "awwh" but my phone autocorrected it to "ahaha." FML

by iPhonekid / 05/27/2012 at 3:19am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I found out that I am allergic to grass, and not supposed to mow lawns. My job is mowing lawns. FML

by jobless / 05/16/2012 at 3:36am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

by lafinesse / 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm / Miscellaneous