About valri3 : Well since you insist...
I am around the age of 17, living in the Houston, Texas area, currently attending High School from which I will graduate from soon, and currently looking into some Universities.
I usually access this site from my iPod, which most of my comments do not go through because of whatever reason the app is going through. So with that being said I probably won't see any messages that you might send me, until it's about a month old...
But in all, looking to please all and be pleased!
Looking to make friends on this site but in all to just laugh at ones misfortunes...FYI. (Though this has been quite a hard one)
About valri3 : Well since you insist...
valri3's FML badges
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
valri3's favorite FMLs
Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML
by dirtyclothess / 05/01/2011 at 8:01pm / Miscellaneous
by me / 04/30/2011 at 12:25am / United States / Health
Today, at work, a coworker started to tell me about his weekend, without me even asking. Halfway through his story, I started to daydream and lost track of time. Bored, I told him, "Hey man, I'll call you back, I've got to get back to work." Then I remembered I wasn't on the phone. FML
by PFCdavila / 03/22/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work
by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek
Today, while at the bakery section of my local supermarket, I heard the beat of what I assumed was a song playing. I really got into it, and bobbed my head and danced a little. After getting some strange looks, I realized the "beat" was a machine mixing frosting. FML
by Anonymous / 03/12/2011 at 10:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, to prevent a fistfight at work, I had to mediate a contested debate between two coworkers on what was evidently a very touchy subject: Which is better, the orange creamsicle or the ice cream sandwich? I was the only one to get in trouble for wasting company time. FML
by geoduck / 02/10/2011 at 12:31am / United States / Work
Today, I got chickenpox. I'm 28 and having chickenpox as an adult is excruciatingly painful. When I told my boss I wasn't going to be at work today because of chickenpox he replied, "That's the worst excuse I've ever heard. Adults don't get chickenpox." He then fired me. FML
by Pox / 02/03/2011 at 10:19pm / United States (Illinois) / Health
Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML
by sandra22 / 01/22/2011 at 3:49am / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up to an early Christmas present on my car. It was a nicely wrapped box containing a dead bird, a half eaten sandwich, and a note reading "MERRY F**KING CHRISTMAS STAN." This will probably be my only Christmas present. My name is Luke. FML
by Anonymous / 12/12/2010 at 9:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals
Today, after playing on the same basketball team for eight years with the same coach, he kicked me off the team to make room for my younger brother, who I taught to play basketball in the first place. FML
by Anonymous / 12/09/2010 at 9:49pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/28/2010 at 6:49pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/26/2010 at 1:44am / Miscellaneous
Today, my best friend was fired from the place we both work at because she's a bad employee. After they fired her she said, "If I go, I'm taking my best friend with me." So they fired me too. I actually liked that job. FML
by Anonymous / 11/24/2010 at 3:45am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
- Today, an exchange student was telling us how he once used a black light to detect semen stains on… Today, I have a condition that, when I pull my foreskin back, it looks as if a rubber band has been… Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to…