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ursa2000

Offline (the 10/24/2014 at 3:17pm) | Search for a member

ursa2000

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 March 2000 (14 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6380
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ursa2000's page activity

Visits<b>neeena94</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 5:48pm<b>waffule365</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 3:07am<b>mybabybella85</b> - the 02/20/2013 at 5:36am

ursa2000's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of ursa2000's badges

ursa2000's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sent to group therapy. A girl spent twenty minutes telling us horrible details of having been raised incestuously. A side effect of my new medication is yawning. FML

Today, my pregnant wife paged my emergency line at work. Thinking she was in serious danger, I raced home and found her hysterically crying. When I asked her what was going on, she replied, "The dogs won't stop barking!" FML

#20615372
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48385) - you deserved it (5817)

On 04/23/2013 at 7:25am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I walked in on my brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML

Today, my grandpa moved into the apartment next door. The walls are wafer-thin. Goodbye sex life. FML

Today, I found out that I am allergic to one of the preservatives that they put in aloe. I found this out after I put some on a severe sunburn I have. Not only am I sunburned, but now I am severely itchy as well. FML

#20613229
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43946) - you deserved it (3744)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32754) - you deserved it (112190)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, it has been over 3 months since my housemates ended their 1 month long relationship. He's still creepily obsessed with her. He picked the bathroom lock when I was in the shower and tried to get in, and then called me a "fucking c*nt" when he realised it was me in there, not her. FML

#20604478
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52394) - you deserved it (4086)

On 04/19/2013 at 7:44am - misc - by pleasekillme (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, it's my only day off work in a while. I told my boss I'd be available via phone in case of emergencies. So far I've been called three times: To ask how the fax works, to let me know it's a slow day, and to ask me where the letter R is on a keyboard. FML

#20604416
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46920) - you deserved it (5500)

On 04/19/2013 at 6:17am - work - by Anonymous - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML

#20603007
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51486) - you deserved it (5962)

On 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I got cut from my track team. My coach told me it was because my sprints were "too fast" for his liking. Huh? FML

#20602567
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52584) - you deserved it (3492)

On 04/18/2013 at 4:34pm - misc - by bhnja_ (man) - Philippines (Mandaue)

Today, a girl was telling me how she was very stressed over her parents' divorce and moving away to another part of the state. While I was listening, I started choking on my saliva. She thought I was laughing. She hasn't spoken to me since. FML

#20601828
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42994) - you deserved it (6837)

On 04/18/2013 at 9:57am - misc - by notlaughing (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, after years of loaning my mother countless amounts of cash that never get paid back, borrowing $60 from her, and being just one day late paying it off due to food poisoning, she sends a very large man to my door to collect, like she's Tony Soprano. FML

#20601228
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44849) - you deserved it (4460)

On 04/18/2013 at 12:01am - money - by some people's parents - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend told me that she's a lesbian. And that she could only stay with me because I had a "girly face and voice". She also admitted to having a crush on my sister. FML

#20600192
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55464) - you deserved it (4723)

On 04/17/2013 at 7:01pm - love - by wut... (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I got ancestry DNA tests for my parents and myself. The DNA testing company informed me that I'm a 50% match for my mother but I share no DNA with my father. Apparently, both my parents forgot that they used a sperm donor. This insignificant detail has slipped their minds for 35 years. FML

#20600180
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46302) - you deserved it (2894)

On 04/17/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Flora (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I grabbed a pair of pants from the dryer in a hurry, trying to make it to the bank. When I rushed in, I felt something fall down my leg. It was a pair of my mom's granny panties that had been stuck inside my jeans. I kicked them aside, hoping no one would notice. They did. FML

#20599573
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44682) - you deserved it (9623)

On 04/17/2013 at 3:01pm - misc - by pantydropper (woman) - United States



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