urrka

Search for a member

urrka

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 25605
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

urrka's page activity

Visits<b>cornyrob</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 6:17am<b>NoName131</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 12:31am<b>bored2015</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 7:16pm<b>ostark</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 1:01am<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 12:55pm<b>Tomfire9</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 10:14pm<b>kayzers</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 3:12pm<b>izzyjaspers</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 9:19pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 8:21pm<b>twitwi2000</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 4:11pm<b>jamescrazy96</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 11:12am<b>xcarlito615x</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 12:39pm<b>Marine1775</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 4:50pm<b>AtomicBooberry</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 10:36pm<b>ilivetoloveyou</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 4:02am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 4:59am<b>XxwhosawesoMExX</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 12:28am<b>PeterB</b> - the 06/09/2009 at 5:17pm

Fucked!<b>izzyjaspers</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 3:20am

urrka's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

urrka's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my boyfriend that my fantasy was for him to eat me out on the dinner table. My boyfriend told me his was me in a Pikachu costume. FML

by pokie / 08/30/2009 at 1:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, after a night of drinking, I woke up with some chips in my bed. I thought it was funny so I went to tell my roommate. Her response was, "That's so funny! It's a typical night out for the two of us. I wake up the next morning with a boy in my bed and you wake up with food in yours." FML

by screwed / 05/21/2009 at 8:18pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my roommate and I were walking to a bar and a group of guys shouted out at us "Hey, it's like we're on Animal Planet, I see a zebra and a gorilla." My roommate was wearing a zebra print shirt. FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2009 at 9:53am / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I was eating a hamburger on the street when a pigeon came down to take a bite. I ran and got 30 birds or so chasing me. My legs were burning, half of my burger was gone, and an entire office building was laughing at me. FML

by fencernick / 04/22/2009 at 6:40am / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I was running the register at my work and this big lady pulls her wad of cash out of her bra and hands it to me. The bills she handed me were moist. FML

by Anonymous / 04/21/2009 at 2:12pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML

by Anonymous / 04/20/2009 at 1:55pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML

by Litterbox / 04/19/2009 at 10:09pm / United States (Texas) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was working as a swim instructor for kids. Teaching them not to be afraid of the water, I put my face in the water and blew bubbles. I asked them to try it. All of them did, except for one. I went right to him and blew bubbles again. He then said to me, "but I just peed in that water." FML

by poolboy / 04/14/2009 at 4:51am / United States (Nevada) / Kids

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

by meteorbabe0101 / 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year old. FML

by brad3720 / 04/13/2009 at 8:44pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML

by shizzy09 / 04/13/2009 at 4:09pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML

by lanbon182 / 04/10/2009 at 1:11am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML

by BadBreath / 04/08/2009 at 11:43pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

by eun / 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous