Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

unhappybitch

Search for a member

unhappybitch

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 8 March 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4059
  • Number of comments : 127
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About unhappybitch : Hey! Thanks for clicking my profile you made me feel special.Well my name is Joey I'm 16, I love to drive, I'm from new York. Wanna talk to me? Hit me up in facebook link... facebook.com/joey.R34 if you want to talk about politics? Cars, global warming anything pretty much. I don't mind being stalked (unless your a guy). I'm usually in the app, so I cant reply to any messages.

unhappybitch's page activity

Visits<b>omegadude1</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 1:07am<b>addictedtoIASIP</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 10:59pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 7:16pm<b>turdoblast</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 8:48am<b>groovy579</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 6:54pm<b>gingerJ</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 3:53pm<b>SpeedToast</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 9:44pm<b>NotAUser</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 6:47pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 11:22am<b>RockNRollAndrew</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 12:55pm<b>tagallopes</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 3:45pm<b>Kinsman</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 6:21pm<b>Gift_of_humor</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 5:18am<b>tigerfish</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 6:33pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 7:36pm<b>ILoveHashtags</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 10:18am<b>o_oBriBrio_o</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 12:58pm<b>lilpsyco</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 2:12am

unhappybitch's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of unhappybitch's badges

unhappybitch's favorite FMLs

Today, my car broke down because someone stuck a dildo in the tail pipe. I'd parked in my driveway. FML

#18069827
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29043) - you deserved it (3026)

On 10/25/2011 at 1:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my car broke down because someone stuck a dildo in the tail pipe. I'd parked in my driveway. FML

#18069827
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29043) - you deserved it (3026)

On 10/25/2011 at 1:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I missed my bus, so I walked home in the rain from school, only to realize my mom had been following me the whole time in the car, laughing her ass off. FML

#17691004
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35853) - you deserved it (3454)

On 09/07/2011 at 7:53pm - misc - by me - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was painting my room. I told my mom not to open the door because I was on a ladder just behind it, with a paint can perched atop. She barged in to ask me what I'd said. FML

#17459271
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30733) - you deserved it (4565)

On 08/13/2011 at 11:31am - misc - by NotSoAnon (man) - United States

Today, some ballbag broke into my house just to take my broom. FML

#17278350
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26609) - you deserved it (2678)

On 07/27/2011 at 9:50am - misc - by kelsjenks - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went over to my girlfriend's house to meet her entire family for the first time. Trying not to be rude, I ate their 12-bean and chorizo soup. Now I'm stuck in the bathroom trying to unclog the toilet with no plunger. FML

#17177083
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37472) - you deserved it (4717)

On 07/19/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by PissNTra - United States

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38067) - you deserved it (3358)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

#17131745
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33041) - you deserved it (3273)

On 07/16/2011 at 2:23am - money - by Tanner - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after he gave me the 'let's just be friends' speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML

#17080368
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30366) - you deserved it (12298)

On 07/12/2011 at 1:10pm - intimacy - by Anonanon (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I updated my facebook status to, "Party at my house this Friday. Like my status if you want to come." After about 3 hours I checked back to discover that the only person who'd liked my status was my grandma. FML

#17074594
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36165) - you deserved it (9363)

On 07/12/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by _Emilyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I moved into my new house. I went over to my neighbors' house to introduce myself. As they opened the door I saw a telescope pointed at my house. FML

#17066979
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33175) - you deserved it (2553)

On 07/11/2011 at 2:16pm - misc - by BMike - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was woken up by my step brother trying to put his tongue in my mouth. FML

#17015904
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62575) - you deserved it (4981)

On 07/07/2011 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by lizownsvirgy - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML

#16896925
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30708) - you deserved it (4860)

On 06/28/2011 at 12:10pm - misc - by Qwerty - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML

#16410366
406 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16664) - you deserved it (77116)

On 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm - intimacy - by yummy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

#16277810
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60588) - you deserved it (10416)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: