About unhappybitch : Hey! Thanks for clicking my profile you made me feel special.Well my name is Joey I'm 16, I love to drive, I'm from new York. Wanna talk to me? Hit me up in facebook link... facebook.com/joey.R34 if you want to talk about politics? Cars, global warming anything pretty much. I don't mind being stalked (unless your a guy). I'm usually in the app, so I cant reply to any messages.
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unhappybitch's favorite FMLs
Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML
by kitty shah / 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by C0r1nn3 / 06/07/2012 at 12:02am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I started my job as one of those sign spinners. About an hour later, some people drove up, yelled, "Bitch, get off my corner," and threw water balloons at me. My boss made me keep working in the soaking wet outfit. FML
by poseidon5213 / 05/17/2012 at 6:02pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, my 20-year-old son's external hard-drive stopped working. He's crying on my shoulder now, not because of the movies, porn, work, or music he probably lost, but because of the now irretrievable complete series of Digimon that he'd collected. FML
by OytoBeAfather / 05/15/2012 at 11:05pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by xharmonyx / 04/24/2012 at 4:29am / United States / Work
Today, my friend was waiting outside the store while I bought a newspaper. Through the window, I saw two guys getting physical with him, so I went outside and they took off. I muttered, "Yeah, I thought so." They then turned around and beat the crap out of us. FML
by burr415 / 04/20/2012 at 6:55pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Health
Today, I introduced my Spanish friend to a girl I've had a crush on for a long time. Because he only spoke Spanish and she only spoke English, I was the translator. The first thing he said to her was, "You are really pretty." I translated it as "I like other men." Later, they found out. FML
by needurlove / 04/15/2012 at 2:49am / United States (Idaho) / Love
by Anonymous / 04/14/2012 at 12:57am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mother made me see the doctor to see if I had irritable bowel syndrome, on the account of how often I go to the restroom. I then had to admit I only go in there to get away from my family. My doctor thought it was hilarious. My mom didn't. FML
by emoflowers / 04/09/2012 at 10:51pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by thatscreamerguy / 04/03/2012 at 7:11am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Geek
Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML
by me / 03/11/2012 at 10:49pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML
by immy504 / 11/30/2011 at 12:39am / United States (Louisiana) / Work
Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML
by Anonymous / 11/27/2011 at 10:03pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Matthew / 11/26/2011 at 9:33pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by _Oblivion_ / 11/26/2011 at 8:51pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health
- Today, I was starting to jack off with what I thought was lotion. Not long after did I realize that… Today, I started looking up profiles on match to get over the real life crush that isn't into me.… Today, I bought my very first new car. I thought I was being pretty clever using the reverse camera…
- Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish… Today, I’m a French teacher in Ukraine, and in class we were debating gun legislation. In order to… Today, I’m teaching French in a university in India. One of the students asked me if Paris was the…