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un1corns

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un1corns
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 857
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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un1corns's favorite FMLs

Today, I went into a haunted house. Around 30 seconds into the adventure, I couldn't stop screaming at the top of my lungs from all of the scares. Suddenly, the little girl ahead of me, who was all by herself, turned around and told me to "suck it up and grow a pair, loser." FML

#13678660
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7948) - you deserved it (33369)

On 11/01/2010 at 7:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I learned I was adopted and that my parents had died in a car accident when I was really young. My girlfriend was sitting next to me when I got the news, and several hours later broke up with me in a text stating, "I don't want to be with someone who doesn't have real parents." FML

#13506620
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66071) - you deserved it (2561)

On 10/19/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by losingit (man) - United States (California)

Today, I spent a hundred dollars on new "business casual" clothes and took two hours to get ready for my interview with a government agency. My interviewer was blind. FML

#13353654
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22973) - you deserved it (6161)

On 10/07/2010 at 9:55am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he would do if I were to get pregnant. Expecting him to give me a cute and supportive answer, he replied, "We'd be finding you a nice flight of stairs to accidentally fall down." FML

#13031931
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33974) - you deserved it (11311)

On 09/13/2010 at 5:14am - love - by vikinggirl (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

#13026235
417 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28831) - you deserved it (26808)

On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, someone whistled, so I turned around. The guy behind me then said: "Did you seriously think that it was meant for you?" FML

#13017861
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31723) - you deserved it (4193)

On 09/12/2010 at 10:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, at work, a little girl was misbehaving. Her dad told her that she would look like me when she grows up. The little girl look horrified while Daddy laughed and kept reassuring her he was "just kidding." FML

#12897093
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25588) - you deserved it (2307)

On 09/04/2010 at 2:52am - misc - by Black Cat 13 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was woken up at 3:00 am to the sound of a tape recording of a baby crying, loudly. This has been going on for 3 nights, non stop. Why? because I brought up the subject of having a baby with my wife. Clearly, you can see where she stands. FML

#12241266
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31546) - you deserved it (10720)

On 08/01/2010 at 4:45am - kids - by kfoehslfns - United States (Oregon)

Today, I woke up to my English bulldog standing over me, getting ready to pee. I didn't move in time. FML

#12225863
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23389) - you deserved it (3822)

On 07/31/2010 at 12:28pm - misc - by Monkey (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I called a suicide prevention hotline. No one picked up. FML

#7542505
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56932) - you deserved it (5661)

On 01/24/2010 at 11:12am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I came home to find my room completely torn apart. My mom and dad start yelling at me asking me why I am doing drugs because she found a tiny baggie on the floor. It was the little bag that spare buttons come in when you buy a dress shirt. FML

#6805892
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27840) - you deserved it (1647)

On 12/18/2009 at 1:52am - misc - by Theo (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I signed up for a psych experiment. I was a damsel in distress on the side of the highway, but no one stopped. Back at the lab, another participant said a half dozen people helped her. The professor was testing how attractiveness effects altruism. I was the unattractive subject. FML

#6651455
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28805) - you deserved it (2373)

On 12/07/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my date sent me a text saying "I'm sorry we're running late, we will be there shortly." I replied asking what she meant by "we". She said her parents, who were coming along to chaperone. I laughed about two 27 year olds having chaperones, until she walked in with her parents. FML

#6258074
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30658) - you deserved it (2635)

On 11/11/2009 at 1:53pm - love - by Tragics (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I talked to a girl on the phone who had previously told me her last relationship "ended very badly." I said, "So let me guess, that jerk cheated on you?" She paused for a few moments and finally replied, "No, he died in a motorcycle accident." FML

#5526901
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31475) - you deserved it (14921)

On 09/28/2009 at 1:34pm - love - by Greg (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I took a look at my boyfriend's videocamera. On it were several videos of me on the toilet. My boyfriend has been hiding the videocamera in the bathroom airvent, and taping me taking dumps for the past three months. FML

#5097909
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65887) - you deserved it (3870)

On 09/07/2009 at 2:05am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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