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umbilicalbiotch

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umbilicalbiotch
  • Town/Country : Houston, US
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1209
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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Today, the dentist sneezed in my mouth. FML

#3386815
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (93873) - you deserved it (5210)

On 07/01/2009 at 2:33am - misc - by kewlio45 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML

#3349914
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11548) - you deserved it (57478)

On 06/29/2009 at 11:01pm - misc - by ZZ - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that the hearing in my left ear is still good. I haven't been able to hear that well out of it for 2 weeks and I thought I popped an eardrum and waited for it to heal. I stuck a Q-Tip in there to clean it out. Turns out there was actually a dead fly in my ear. For 2 weeks. FML

#3130305
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50224) - you deserved it (9601)

On 06/22/2009 at 9:13pm - health - by JK710 - United States (Georgia)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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