uguysareidiots

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uguysareidiots

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 10 July 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4625
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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uguysareidiots's page activity

Visits<b>Formula86</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 3:54pm<b>amyfann</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 2:09pm<b>RhineBl</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 11:42pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:38am<b>Maddoctor</b> - the 01/20/2010 at 2:26am<b>AHX</b> - the 12/17/2009 at 5:55pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 08/21/2009 at 7:27pm<b>hatehatehatehate</b> - the 08/19/2009 at 9:24am<b>prplr</b> - the 08/17/2009 at 5:24pm<b>tehmadness</b> - the 08/17/2009 at 5:14pm<b>GR3453m0nk3y</b> - the 08/09/2009 at 12:23pm<b>greenbiscuits</b> - the 08/09/2009 at 5:24am<b>cpatrick820</b> - the 08/09/2009 at 4:11am<b>Mikayla82ca</b> - the 08/05/2009 at 3:13pm<b>ThePhantomGamer</b> - the 08/03/2009 at 7:00pm<b>jumpingbean13</b> - the 07/23/2009 at 9:24pm<b>surfbumm</b> - the 05/30/2009 at 2:32am<b>ibabyd0llaz</b> - the 05/29/2009 at 6:44pm

uguysareidiots's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

uguysareidiots's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was watching a DVD, I noticed a spider crawling on my crotch area. So, I panicked and smashed the spider, smashing my nuts in the process. FML

by jrocks / 05/19/2009 at 1:06pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, after the church service was over, my two year old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang " Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

by nana / 05/19/2009 at 10:04am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I was shaving off my beard for the first time in a very long time. I decided to have a little fun with it, and shaved my beard first into a goatee, then a handle-bar, then, finally, into a Hitler mustache. My electric razor dies. I don't have a normal one or an extra battery. FML

by nomorebeard / 03/25/2009 at 10:13am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was nude modeling for the first time for a life art class. The only criteria for the class was that I not move at all while being observed. After a few seconds I noticed a really hot girl drawing me. I got a hard on. FML

by Opplyst11 / 03/18/2009 at 4:37pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids