Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ucoolgirl31

Offline (the 07/04/2015 at 2:14am) | Search for a member

ucoolgirl31

14Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2080
  • Number of comments : 146
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About ucoolgirl31 : I have the best sense of humor... :)
Message me if you please.
It's been a while guys but I'm back!
:)

ucoolgirl31's page activity

Visits<b>DarkSmoke591</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 5:56pm<b>ki087</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 10:46am<b>japcrap</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 9:33am<b>secondcitystyles</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 2:19am<b>Twigman8</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 4:02am<b>obviouslywaffles</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 6:11am<b>savagetitan</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 8:57pm<b>minimanion</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 1:29pm<b>Stxsyh</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 1:07pm<b>SpawnofAthena</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 2:24am<b>kianabanannna</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 11:16pm<b>facelick</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 3:22pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 9:15pm<b>Travwins</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 7:35am<b>FranzFerdinand</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 2:21pm<b>iT_Cereal</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 4:05am<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 11:56pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 9:40am

Fucked!<b>ki087</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 4:46pm<b>Twigman8</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 10:02am<b>savagetitan</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 2:57am<b>minimanion</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 7:29pm<b>LEGATE_LANIUS</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 6:32pm<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 10:49am<b>MrFloooo</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 9:42am<b>Manosapo</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 5:31pm<b>TheBeast26</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 7:42am<b>KeithTheGreat</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 5:47am<b>Jake42100</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 12:21am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 12:18am<b>aclark2523</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 6:27pm<b>jessiejamesp</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 10:14am

ucoolgirl31's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of ucoolgirl31's badges

ucoolgirl31's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner. Things went great, until my grandma arrived. She thought it would be okay to continue our friendly prank war by congratulating me on my "wife's" pregnancy. My girlfriend actually believed it, and now thinks she's the "other woman". FML

#20667410
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52651) - you deserved it (5519)

On 05/16/2013 at 5:23pm - love - by paging dr. kevorkian (man) - Netherlands

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

#20667353
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52181) - you deserved it (8957)

On 05/16/2013 at 4:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML

#20667250
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77202) - you deserved it (6509)

On 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by need € for new iron (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, the regional manager of my company came out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty, and when he reached out to shake my hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, you made me wet." FML

#20660456
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48212) - you deserved it (9198)

On 05/13/2013 at 8:01am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

Today, I can no longer leave my son at daycare, because at the age of 5, he's started manipulating the girls there into fighting over him. A kid lost a baby tooth in one such brawl. FML

#20607466
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52316) - you deserved it (6786)

On 04/20/2013 at 12:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Thailand

Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML

#20604301
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50067) - you deserved it (9479)

On 04/19/2013 at 3:27am - misc - by thanks gramps - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, I met my new girlfriend at her house for the very first time. And her 17 cats, whose names all begin with the letter "K", because they're all "kewl kats." FML

#20601896
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55817) - you deserved it (8907)

On 04/18/2013 at 10:37am - love - by obnum - United States

Today, I played Call of Duty with my new flatmate. He continuously lost and was outraged that a girl beat him. It resulted in him shouting at me, claiming that since I'm Muslim, I must be part of the Taliban, which would explain my gaming skills. FML

#20584680
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47121) - you deserved it (8640)

On 04/11/2013 at 5:11am - misc - by zahra_786 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to get my grandparents out of jail, because they were caught having sex in a public place. They excused their actions by saying that you can only be young and stupid once, so if you continue doing stupid actions, you are still young. FML

Today, I got a letter from Yale law school saying I got a 4 year full scholarship. I called my dad crying and read the whole thing... even the bottom, which said, "April fools! Love mom and dad." FML

#20570035
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62045) - you deserved it (6207)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:46pm - misc - by madiison09 - United States

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84383) - you deserved it (8731)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML

#20562346
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72533) - you deserved it (11075)

On 03/27/2013 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, whilst texting my boyfriend on the train, I noticed the woman sitting next to me staring intently at my phone. After letting my boyfriend know, he sent a message saying, "Are we gonna involve the dog again? Last night was fun." She gasped and screamed that I'm a "twisted dog-humping bitch." FML

#20560035
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40285) - you deserved it (6850)

On 03/25/2013 at 8:28pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I asked my boyfriend to give me a back rub. He claimed that he had a sore hand, so I retorted, "You have two hands, right?" Still bitter about not being able to have sex with me while I'm on my period, he shot back, "You have two holes, right?" I give up. FML

#20540243
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33228) - you deserved it (51110) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/11/2013 at 8:21pm - intimacy - by Lilypad (woman) - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: