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uberultrafish911

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uberultrafish911
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 12 June 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 3402
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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uberultrafish911's favorite FMLs

Today, I got out of bed and immediately went to the window as it was supposed to snow today. I saw a man walking his dog and he waved at me. I waved back enthusiastically and realised I was naked. FML

#7053396
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7366) - you deserved it (24289)

On 12/31/2009 at 6:47am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I volunteered to be Auctioned off for Charity. I went for $3. FML

#6130928
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34184) - you deserved it (6261)

On 11/03/2009 at 2:06am - money - by LC (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went on a date, and within the first five minutes, he said, "Before we go any further and get anymore serious, you need to know a few things, I have kissed a guy drunk because it was a dare, and have a $400 silk rose Victoria's Secret blanket." FML

#6128327
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24133) - you deserved it (4857)

On 11/02/2009 at 10:41pm - misc - by Shawty (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to a family counseling session because my parents are getting a divorce. I told the counselor that I feel guilty because I feel like I caused it. She says that there is no way I could have caused it, that it's my parents' problem when my mom interrupts her to say "Yes she did." FML

#6120985
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36866) - you deserved it (2919)

On 11/02/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by problemchild (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at Wendy's with my boyfriend, I realized that he made more pleasure sounds when eating his Baconator than he did while sleeping with me. FML

#6009820
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14408) - you deserved it (4368)

On 10/26/2009 at 5:34pm - intimacy - by FYLyfer (woman) - United States

Today, I saw an article that Burger King is selling a whopper with seven patties in celebration of the Windows Seven release. Upon reading this, I immediately got an extremely forceful erection. I think this is a sign to stop putting off that diet. FML

#6001058
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13220) - you deserved it (8474)

On 10/26/2009 at 12:25am - intimacy - by Brian (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower, instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

#5974378
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28885) - you deserved it (7981)

On 10/24/2009 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by sad_dad (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend came to wake me up with some flowers and breakfast in bed. We started getting intimate, after a short while, there was a knock. We looked out of the window and there was the window cleaner with his thumbs up and grinning. FML

#5754527
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13902) - you deserved it (3181)

On 10/10/2009 at 6:19am - intimacy - by Taraa3 (woman) - United Kingdom (Hartlepool)

Today, I open my front door and saw a covered basket with a card from my girlfriend on it. I picked it up and read, "Hope this cheers you up." I uncovered the basket to find a golden labrador puppy. Its eyes were closed and it wasn't breathing. FML

#5541044
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62627) - you deserved it (2489)

On 09/29/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by rainedaddy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in class, playing online poker and keeping up my winning record. I eventually got seated against a guy who beat me at every hand. I heard laughing behind me after I lost all my winnings. The guy behind me had just made an account, looked over my shoulder, and won all my money. FML

#5333449
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14026) - you deserved it (46244)

On 09/18/2009 at 3:15pm - money - by shushingmoon (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, after picking up my 6 year old from school, he says, "Drew said his dad could beat you up." I told him that he needs to respect his own father more and stand up for me! I get home, look up his class roster and low and behold, Drew's dad beat me up in Jr. High. FML

#5189179
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26024) - you deserved it (17284)

On 09/11/2009 at 4:11pm - work - by jeph23 (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML

#5186753
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30751) - you deserved it (3082)

On 09/11/2009 at 1:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML

#5185594
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34186) - you deserved it (5254)

On 09/11/2009 at 10:48am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML

#5173603
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11254) - you deserved it (66439)

On 09/10/2009 at 7:17pm - love - by itisthedude (man) - United States (Virginia)



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