uHazFailedTotall

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uHazFailedTotall

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 June 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4143
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 12 posted

About uHazFailedTotall : Go away, your bedtime is scaring everyone.

uHazFailedTotall's page activity

Visits<b>jengo54</b> - the 11/26/2016 at 11:22pm<b>maria95aa</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 5:24am<b>MitchRapp</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 6:08pm<b>AzureDawn</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 1:24pm<b>Addiepop</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 6:41am<b>That1One1Chick</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 12:05pm<b>RandomJam124</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 11:01pm<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 9:31am<b>Shay_Shay97</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 8:21pm<b>FigureSkater7713</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 7:31pm<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 3:28pm<b>kev1316</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 9:07am<b>170107</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 6:41pm<b>maddiealexx_</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 1:55pm<b>boricualuv</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 10:06pm<b>___Unknown__08</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 6:52am<b>chicken_dip</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 2:30pm<b>Kat_Kat23</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 1:46am

Fucked!<b>maddiealexx_</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 7:55pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 4:42pm

uHazFailedTotall's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

uHazFailedTotall's favorite FMLs

Today, I went for a jog. While passing by my neighbor's house, their six year old son started throwing peanuts at me screaming, "I hope this kills you!" because I'm allergic to peanuts. FML

by Anonymous / 08/25/2009 at 8:52pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML

by isoheartcaitlin / 08/24/2009 at 11:34pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I was handling corrosive chemicals when I accidentally spilled a beaker of Hydrochloric Acid on myself. I had to strip naked and use the emergency shower with my boss and my hot coworker watching. The worst part was when I realized my coworker was laughing at the size of my penis. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2009 at 2:33pm / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, I got fired from work. Why? I finally took a stand for myself and confronted my co-worker of writing things up in my name for herself, and it getting deducted from my check. So she goes to the manager and accuses me of sexual harassment. Everyone applauded. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2009 at 10:50am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I was going to check out my secret condom stash. When I looked inside, I found a note. The note read: "Thanks hun, I really needed this. Love, Mom". FML

Today, it dawned on me that I've been married for 6 months, but because of the Army I've spent only around 12 days total with my wife. FML

by broooooock / 07/15/2009 at 9:04pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I came out to my dad. He called me weak minded and said that he has never been more disappointed in me. I didn't come out as gay. I came out as a vegetarian. FML

by pkstarstorm / 07/14/2009 at 2:58am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of a month had to leave early. I asked him why and he replied that his brother was getting off the bus and he needed to feed him. I had never met his brother, and I said "He can't feed himself? What is he, retarded?" He is. FML

by Anonymous / 07/09/2009 at 8:19pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I spent 3 hours washing my hands to get the pony out of the soap bar. I'm 16. FML

by Soapy / 06/28/2009 at 3:23am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, my adorable five and a half year old boy told me that when he grows up he's going to be my boyfriend. I thought it was kinda cute until I asked him why. "Because you need one." FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2009 at 9:12am / United States (Maine) / Kids

Today, I was on the bus when my crush told me to come and sit with him. I got all excited, especially when he put his arm around me. He then whispered in my ear "Hey, is your friend over there single?" FML

by vishurricanes / 06/09/2009 at 11:34pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I got a computer. When I opened it, I found out that my dad had made himself the administrator. He made it so everything shut off after 11 o'clock, and made it so I couldn't download anything without his password. FML

by graduate / 06/06/2009 at 9:17am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML

by foretwintie / 06/06/2009 at 7:18am / Canada (Quebec) / Work

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

by sucks / 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, I was working at a grocery store when a couple of my co-workers called a code pink in aisle 22, which means there was an attractive woman in that aisle. After hearing about how hot she was, I went over to see her for myself. It was my mom. FML

by sonofmilf / 05/17/2009 at 1:46am / United States (Illinois) / Work