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tymarie2012

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tymarie2012
  • Town/Country : Somewhere in the Mississippi, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 289
  • Number of comments : 138
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About tymarie2012 : Wouldn't you like to know

tymarie2012's last visitors

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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tymarie2012's favorite FMLs

Today, I cut myself while shaving my globes. My girlfriend now refuses to stop teasing me about being "fisted by Edward Scissorhands." FML

#19167589
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15345) - you deserved it (5415)

On 02/26/2012 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by still learning - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, while in bed with my fiancée, I asked her to take off her pants so we could get it on. She said, "No, I don't feel like squeezing into them again." I was cockblocked by a pair of jeans. FML

#18974719
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22727) - you deserved it (3521)

On 02/02/2012 at 4:31am - intimacy - by DieTrying - United States (California)

Today, while driving to my girlfriend's house, I passed up a stop sign without stopping. A car passing by honked. I honked back several times and flipped them the finger. Turns out it was my girlfriend's dad trying to say hi. FML

#18767011
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6786) - you deserved it (41745)

On 01/10/2012 at 3:50pm - misc - by Tom Ali - United States

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16141) - you deserved it (28370)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML

#17913530
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26552) - you deserved it (5327)

On 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm - misc - by Pookaa (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML

#17627685
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12553) - you deserved it (38889)

On 08/31/2011 at 3:36am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I was having horrible morning sickness. I was violently throwing up, could hardly breathe, and was gasping for air between each round of puking. My husband, in the other room playing video games, snapped and shouted, "Why can't you just be quiet?!" FML

#17311021
306 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35661) - you deserved it (4707)

On 07/30/2011 at 5:06pm - health - by Ceej - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for 3 years. She's pregnant. I'm a virgin. FML

#17023153
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45126) - you deserved it (8292)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:19am - love - by Nick (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32647) - you deserved it (11850)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had to explain to my little brother that my tampons weren't ear plugs. FML

#16642737
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27025) - you deserved it (3195)

On 06/13/2011 at 10:24am - kids - by Evaki1 - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I woke up to the sound of sirens. My ex-girlfriend, who I had broken up with the day before, had set my car on fire. I had just finished restoring it. I was going to insure it today. FML

#14212180
145 comments

Today, I was recovering from an operation. After I felt better, I checked my phone. There were 35 missed calls and angry text messages from my boyfriend asking why I wasn't at his house to cook his dinner. FML

#13017845
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29466) - you deserved it (4538)

On 09/12/2010 at 10:02am - love - by mrsfantastic - United Kingdom

Today, my maid washed my PS3. Yes, with soap and water. FML

#7972582
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29820) - you deserved it (13438)

On 02/07/2010 at 12:42pm - money - by Vastu (man) - Nepal

Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife. FML

#6722392
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32805) - you deserved it (2494)

On 12/12/2009 at 1:02pm - misc - by RBEE (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went out to celebrate my birthday with a big group of friends. After waiting in line to get into a club, the bouncer looked me up and down and said, "No fat chicks." My friends went into the club without me and left me to take a $100 taxi home alone. FML

#6178277
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32622) - you deserved it (6149)

On 11/06/2009 at 1:59am - misc - by obese_chicken (woman) - Australia



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