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twitch559

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twitch559

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  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 75
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twitch559's favorite FMLs

Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML

#20136968
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23298) - you deserved it (5160)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I decided to watch some porn to cheer myself up after having recently been dumped. Halfway through wanking the gibbon, I got a horrifyingly painful cramp in my foot, and cried out in pain. Ten seconds later, with my pants still down, my dad rushed in to see if I was okay. FML

#20135660
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24198) - you deserved it (13635)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by whoreticulturalist (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)



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