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twenty

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twenty

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 May 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 18111
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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twenty's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 4:37pm<b>trukillapanda</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 9:27pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:18pm<b>ha</b> - the 11/14/2009 at 11:36am<b>nuclear</b> - the 10/08/2009 at 3:07am<b>elgeish</b> - the 09/16/2009 at 12:15am<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/15/2009 at 11:31pm<b>blargity</b> - the 08/01/2009 at 4:33pm<b>redxapplexoxo</b> - the 07/12/2009 at 12:47am<b>Hemlock420</b> - the 06/25/2009 at 7:35am<b>STN</b> - the 06/22/2009 at 1:55pm<b>jonte0ne</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 12:40pm<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 12:39am<b>xabuko</b> - the 05/31/2009 at 5:54pm<b>altna</b> - the 05/31/2009 at 5:48pm<b>muffy_da_bear</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 3:16pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 10:36am<b>bsw001</b> - the 05/22/2009 at 10:31pm

twenty's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

twenty's favorite FMLs

Today, I was shopping at a supermarket. As I was about to pay for my items, I noticed the cashier was very cute. Trying to be nice, I smiled. She smiled back and said "Hello, how are you?" Instead of saying "I'm good" or "I'm okay", I said "I'm gay". FML

#1972272
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58927) - you deserved it (23418)

On 05/16/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by UncleRory (man) - United States (New York)

Today, the girl I've had a crush on for a year finally said she'd go out with me. On the way over to pick her up, she called me and said she'd couldn't go because she was going out to dinner with her ex-boyfriend to talk things over. She asked if she could use the reservations I had made. FML

#1967473
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39953) - you deserved it (2131)

On 05/15/2009 at 4:44pm - love - by FriendsZone (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was sitting next to this really cute guy in choir class. Trying to make conversation, I asked him what his favorite song was. He replied "Leave Me Alone". I asked him who it was by and he said, "It's not a song, I just want you to leave me alone". FML

#1963959
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28151) - you deserved it (8120)

On 05/15/2009 at 2:35pm - misc - by jayden5 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was pulling my trolley luggage at the airport when I passed 2 cute girls smiling at me. Thinking I looked real cool, I kept on walking without paying heed to anything else. Then my brother shouted asking me what was I doing, only to realise that the handle had come off a few metres back. FML

#1954003
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9824) - you deserved it (37531)

On 05/15/2009 at 12:41am - misc - by NotSoCool (man) - Singapore

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML

#1930454
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16971) - you deserved it (94652)

On 05/14/2009 at 1:46pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML

#1800346
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58420) - you deserved it (5646)

On 05/10/2009 at 1:05am - kids - by sucksforme. (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while working my job as a cashier, one of the customers that came to the register was a midget. As part of store policy, I had to ID him, and his driver's license said he was from Florida. So I asked, without catching myself, "How's the weather down there?" FML

#1793303
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30233) - you deserved it (47789)

On 05/09/2009 at 10:05pm - work - by Failoffel (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my parents hosted a party at our house. After seeing one of the extremely beautiful guests, I went to masturbate in my room. When I was about to finish, my bedroom door opened suddenly. It was my mom showing around 10 party guests that our dog can open doors. FML

#1791192
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23393) - you deserved it (79149)

On 05/09/2009 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by Jeremy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

#1550190
358 comments

I agree, your life sucks (176940) - you deserved it (45604)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I forgot my inhaler. I had an asthma attack and had to go to the ER. The doctors told me it wasn't an asthma attack. It was just a panic attack from worrying about whether I would get an asthma attack. FML

#1529921
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58298) - you deserved it (16970)

On 05/01/2009 at 5:07pm - health - by jlover42 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to my son's soccer game. I cheered his name at the top my lungs and waved with a grin on my face. I saw him whisper something to a team mate so I watched the film my husband took later that night. His friend asked, "Who is that?" and my son replied, "I don't know some fat bitch." FML

#1230911
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92288) - you deserved it (17311)

On 04/22/2009 at 5:46pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my son and I were on an airplane playing "I Spy" to pass the time. The game went back and forth a few times when my son said, "I spy something yellow." After pointing out numerous yellow objects on the plane I gave up. He said, "Daddy! It's your teeth!" FML

#1225856
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50477) - you deserved it (17687)

On 04/22/2009 at 3:46pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I hinted at getting it on towards my wife (it's been 2 weeks since we last did). She answered with "no I'm to tired", within 2 minutes she said, "I'm gonna go use the treadmill". She got all hot and sweaty for about 30 minutes, but it was with the treadmill. FML

#1224037
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51766) - you deserved it (5331)

On 04/22/2009 at 2:47pm - love - by tripb101 - United States (Oregon)

Today, my shower is being renovated so I decided to wash my hair in the kitchen sink. I put my two year old son on the counter next to me so I could keep him close. As I was rinsing out my hair, my son started playing with the light switches. He flicked the garbage disposal on accident. FML

#1206397
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67112) - you deserved it (25642)

On 04/21/2009 at 8:12pm - kids - by hairball (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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