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turtlegrl66

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turtlegrl66

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  • Number of visits : 2099
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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turtlegrl66's page activity

Visits<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 9:39pm<b>AHopelessDeath</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 3:47am<b>AleCS</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 2:03am<b>perdix</b> - the 07/24/2012 at 4:36am

turtlegrl66's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of turtlegrl66's badges

turtlegrl66's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38015) - you deserved it (3972) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it later, it had 20 comments on the picture. I was feeling good until I read the comments and looked at the picture again. I left my vibrator on the the bathroom counter. FML

#19609877
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11225) - you deserved it (58665)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Hunter101 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML

#19579357
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10421) - you deserved it (32424)

On 05/05/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by mhm (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the school nurse called me in. She said she knew I was pregnant and she was worried about how it was affecting my grades. I'm not pregnant. Apparently I'm just stupid and fat. FML

Today, I was talking to my co-workers about how I've sadly been an orphan since an early age. One of them exclaimed, "Hey, just like Batman!" FML

#19557716
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21566) - you deserved it (4489)

On 05/01/2012 at 9:58am - work - by Nice (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was visiting my 8-year-old nephew. He told me he learned about fire safety, so I asked him what he'd do if there were a fire right now. He pushed me out of the way and I fell, then he ran over me and out the front door, leaving me on the floor in pain. FML

#19555079
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18907) - you deserved it (3720)

On 04/30/2012 at 8:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

#19547170
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36267) - you deserved it (8911)

On 04/29/2012 at 11:10am - intimacy - by ShadowJack - United States

Today, at a concert, I got into a fight with a man in a banana suit. FML

#19546385
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9710) - you deserved it (18185)

On 04/29/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I discovered that my daughter refuses to eat, but not because she's anorexic. Apparently, her health class has learned about the digestive system and now she refuses to "take part in something so gross." FML

#19530621
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23822) - you deserved it (2236)

On 04/26/2012 at 12:36am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my new dog unburied my old dog and chewed on his bones. FML

#19520416
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44356) - you deserved it (3212)

On 04/24/2012 at 1:42am - animals - by jessica071509 - United States (Arizona)

Today, my mum bought a phone. Since teaching her how to text, I have received 27 messages, repeatedly saying the word "penis". FML

#19505040
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21916) - you deserved it (4184)

On 04/21/2012 at 5:26am - misc - by jaderie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while looking through my wedding photos, I realised my wife had done a duck face in every single one. FML

#19496136
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37942) - you deserved it (5768)

On 04/19/2012 at 3:46pm - love - by caaarl (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, while I was in the midst of the most mind-blowing shower sex ever, the fire alarm went off. My girlfriend had left the stove top on and the entire kitchen had caught on fire. So instead of finishing, I frantically ran around naked trying to douse the flames. FML

#19484170
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26938) - you deserved it (3849)

On 04/17/2012 at 2:13pm - intimacy - by blocked_by_fire (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like his grandma's house. FML

#19477089
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18069) - you deserved it (4418)

On 04/16/2012 at 2:53am - misc - by hdgyfjdzdfg (woman) - United States

Today, my dad came to pick me up. It would have been nicer if he'd had his clothes on. FML

#19476340
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21943) - you deserved it (1627)

On 04/16/2012 at 12:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)



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