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tub944

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tub944
  • Town/Country : Houston, U.S.
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 617
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About tub944 : Potatoes

tub944's last visitors

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tub944's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

tub944's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad was putting seasoning salt into his mashed potatoes, when the lid came off and poured a ton of salt into the pot. My parents hate wasting food, so we still had to eat it. I think my taste buds are broken. FML

Today, while reading over my sent application email to a job I have been trying to get, I found out my brother had put "Heil Hitler!" as my signature. FML

#17996037
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33111) - you deserved it (4700)

On 10/16/2011 at 3:15am - work - by Unemployed - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to visit my grandpa. He has an easily excited dog, who barreled into my freshly broken knee. I felt my knee move out of place again. The dog chipped a tooth. We went to the vet first. FML

#17988590
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30277) - you deserved it (2544)

On 10/15/2011 at 10:02am - health - by KilteDKilleR - United States (Utah)

Today, my balls were stepped on while I was taking a nap in the park. The man said he didn't see me lying there. I was wearing a neon orange jacket. FML

#17986528
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24984) - you deserved it (9880)

On 10/15/2011 at 12:33am - misc - by dak-rod423 (man) - United States (California)

Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML

#17984134
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23791) - you deserved it (4596)

On 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by myasshurts - United States (Michigan)

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

#17843744
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10056) - you deserved it (27699)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)

Today, I paid a repair man $65 to come to my house and fix my washer. He walked in, looked at the washer, bent over and removed a large steel bolt with a bright red tag sticking out the side saying "Remove before use." He then looked at me and said "all fixed." FML

#17742715
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7553) - you deserved it (36896)

On 09/14/2011 at 5:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a really bad sunburn on my face while at the lake. Not to worry, though; my friends made me feel better by saying, "It takes the attention away from your acne." FML

#17482360
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24916) - you deserved it (3339)

On 08/15/2011 at 5:38pm - health - by Username - United States

Today, my mom looked through my browser history and saw Chatroulette. She thought I'd gotten into online gambling, and wouldn't believe me when I explained what it really was. After I insisted on showing her, the first chat window to open contained cocks as far as the eye could see. FML

#16488839
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19353) - you deserved it (34648)

On 06/03/2011 at 8:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my neighbors got a rooster. FML

#15427360
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55215) - you deserved it (5983)

On 03/22/2011 at 3:23am - animals - by negin -

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34817) - you deserved it (30430)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, my house is suffering from an infestation of these tiny black beetles. After brushing my teeth tonight, I was rinsing out my toothbrush when I found that one of the beetles had curled up to die between the bristles. FML

#13883549
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27207) - you deserved it (3162)

On 11/18/2010 at 12:04am - health - by twice-a-day (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML

#8938821
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18298) - you deserved it (18474)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:43am - love - by anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

#7773873
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101042) - you deserved it (11755)

On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

#7773873
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101042) - you deserved it (11755)

On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)



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