Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

tsezu

Search for a member

tsezu

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 16821
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

tsezu's page activity

Visits<b>MrMcRooster</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 6:46am<b>KangarooRat</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 5:34pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:00pm<b>jessxoxo28</b> - the 02/24/2010 at 4:47pm<b>jc21</b> - the 01/18/2010 at 8:43pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/28/2009 at 5:20pm<b>Taryn</b> - the 05/14/2009 at 5:54pm<b>xXNancyXx</b> - the 05/13/2009 at 5:03pm<b>bamfanr94</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 2:27am<b>miltonbradley</b> - the 04/28/2009 at 4:14pm<b>Sunol</b> - the 04/27/2009 at 2:22pm<b>Occam</b> - the 04/14/2009 at 11:12am<b>AwesomeSauce</b> - the 03/22/2009 at 11:10pm<b>swimmin_diva</b> - the 03/22/2009 at 3:01pm<b>TheLoneWolf</b> - the 03/20/2009 at 11:55pm<b>jmode</b> - the 03/20/2009 at 6:56pm<b>Sakeyaki</b> - the 03/18/2009 at 10:14pm<b>ryandanielt</b> - the 03/17/2009 at 9:17pm

tsezu's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

tsezu's favorite FMLs

Today, my good friend who just had a baby girl sent her newborn's pictures to me via picture message. To reply, instead of writing "Awwwwww" I wrote "Ewwwwww" by mistake. FML

#873760
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25028) - you deserved it (59385)

On 04/08/2009 at 4:42pm - kids - by nothing (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got back my math test. Instead of taking the time to mark the mistakes, my professor just circled the bottom half of the page and wrote "OMG." FML

#853708
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92038) - you deserved it (27461)

On 04/07/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by aviators (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML

#794025
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71127) - you deserved it (18412)

On 04/04/2009 at 12:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was feeling sick and having trouble breathing easily. I decided to take a nap and apparently ended up sleeping with my mouth wide open since breathing was an issue. I woke up to my boyfriend trying to put his penis in my mouth. FML

#632473
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (169521) - you deserved it (34149)

On 03/26/2009 at 9:45pm - intimacy - by coughandcold (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friend and i thought it would be funny if we could both fit into her big sweatpants. When we tried to take a step, she fell on top of me. She started peeing uncontrollably. We had to cut ourselves out of the sweatpants. FML

#508489
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50037) - you deserved it (34361)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:11pm - misc - by emilyxoxoxo - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in there today and there was a note that said "Little Sister, stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML

#497309
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29646) - you deserved it (110766)

On 03/20/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Stacy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was nude modeling for the first time for a life art class. The only criteria for the class was that I not move at all while being observed. After a few seconds I noticed a really hot girl drawing me. I got a hard on. FML

#442796
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75520) - you deserved it (27845)

On 03/18/2009 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Opplyst11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor... and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML

#278783
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52374) - you deserved it (98210)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by SpiderMan (man) - United States (Michigan)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: