tpike1296

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tpike1296

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 16 December 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6354
  • Number of comments : 165
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

About tpike1296 : Updating my info again. I'm a brony, so that's important. My profile picture is an unfinished OC. (No cutie mark, or full name) Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash are both best pony. If anyone wants to reach me to talk, whether it be about MLP, music, video games, computers, science, or random stuff, I'd be more than happy to talk.
email: tpike1296@aol.com
Skype: xxxxunderground
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/133741if3 (Please ignore the horrible user name, that was when I was obsessed with The Matrix and was attempting to learn how to hack, and Facebook won't let you change it)

tpike1296's page activity

Visits<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 7:17pm<b>Startled_Toenail</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 6:07am<b>walker9879</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 6:33am<b>PrincessMudkip</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 10:04pm<b>nerdtron430</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 6:10pm<b>cacheson</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 4:57pm<b>Krictix</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 9:03am<b>teentee401</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 9:46pm<b>turdoblast</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 6:16pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 8:02am<b>stereofeathers</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 2:42pm<b>ZoeeeGuyss</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 9:53pm<b>dianadarwish</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 11:27pm<b>EbinKebin</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 11:04am<b>_Domster_46</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 8:51pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 12:51pm<b>izkiz</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 3:26pm<b>BowChikaFuckYou</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 2:10am

Fucked!<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 1:17am<b>walker9879</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 12:33pm<b>PrincessMudkip</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 4:05am

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tpike1296's favorite FMLs

Today, I completed the arduous, nearly hour-long process of answering the eHarmony dating questionnaire, only to be told my answers were too "unique" for them to match me with anyone. I had chosen "the world" as my distance range. FML

by DrakeScott / 11/02/2011 at 2:14pm / United States (Maine) / Love

Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Just as she took her shirt off, her phone rang. It was her mom demanding she return home. Now I've been cockblocked, and my girlfriend's mom seems to be a god damn clairvoyant. Awesome. FML

by Anonymous / 10/27/2011 at 10:49pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boss made me run yet another stupid errand. When I delivered the paperwork to his office, I saw an email printout on his desk. Apparently, he has a plan in the works to get me "fried" next month. I'm not sure whether to give him a letter of resignation or a bottle of barbecue sauce. FML

by last literate / 10/27/2011 at 12:15pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Work

Today, I paid $70 to learn from the vet that my cat doesn't have a UTI, he's just developed a fetish for peeing on plastic bags. FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2011 at 9:13pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

by Mini-wanker / 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was installing wireless surveillance cameras outside my workplace. Before mounting them, I pointed them around the building to make sure there was a good signal and picture. I got inside to the monitor just in time to see a kid steal one of the cameras. FML

by Anonymous / 09/29/2011 at 1:44pm / United States / Work

Today, my nephew spent a long while enthusiastically telling me how amazing his new 3D TV system is. I felt his pain as his face turned white when he remembered that I'm blind in one eye since birth. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2011 at 12:15am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while waiting in line at Gamestop, another customer and the cashier started chatting about how Pokémon is for kids, and anyone over 10 who's into it is weird. Embarrassed, I put the new Pokémon game back on the shelf and snuck out of the store. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2011 at 3:18pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years said she was leaving me because recently I wasn't making much money, and was playing too many video games. I recently got a raise at my job of 5 years. The job? Testing video games. FML

by Eric Moore / 09/25/2011 at 4:12am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, while at work, after reading more than 100 FMLs and moderating more than 500, I decided to write one of my own with the help of my boss, who had been standing next to me for over an hour. "How about being fired?" FML

Today, I found out that I have testicular cancer for the second time in two years, and they may end up removing my last testicle. Knowing full well I was also born with an extra rib, the doctor at the consultation joked, "Hey, you'll be three quarters of the way to being a woman." FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2011 at 7:54pm / United States / Health

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my younger brother decided it would be funny to put rubbing alcohol in my contact lens case while I had them soaking overnight. I didn't realize this until I put the first one in. FML

by redeye / 09/19/2011 at 1:03am / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I bought a book by a #1 bestselling author, hoping it would distract me from having my manuscript rejected, as well as learn what made their book so successful. Now I realize I need to say stuff like, "I wish I had great boobs (hehe... boobs)" to get my works published. FML

by WishIWasAWriter / 09/08/2011 at 2:03pm / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Miscellaneous