![[fr]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
About tpike1296 : Hello all, I might as well update my info, so, since I have no life, I'll do it with a rap. Before that, here are some facts about me you don't care about.
1. Computers are my life
2. I am blind in my right eye
3. I don't comment very often, as I am an antisocial freak
4. I annoy many people, yet have no clue why....
5. I'm too lazy to make a fifth fact
6. My sixth fact is a lie
7. My eighth fact is true
8. The sixth fact is cake
9. The cake is a lie
Today, I wrote a rap for my FML profile, and FML decided to eat it. FML
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I married the man of my dreams. While I was being driven to our wedding reception, I checked my Facebook. My husband had just updated his status to "Me and the bitch just got hitched." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7671) - you deserved it (1822)
On 05/06/2012 at 2:01pm - love - by Bridget (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6749) - you deserved it (751)
On 05/06/2012 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Kwalker3 - United States (California)
Today, while watching TV with my wife, I realized that we were still watching "My Little Pony" even though the kids had been asleep for half an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14259) - you deserved it (3309)
On 04/19/2012 at 12:08pm - misc - by ajnmegs - United States (Colorado)
Today, I realized the reason my 20-year-old daughter has been so moody and aggressive is because she missed the promotional My Little Pony toys at McDonald's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6308) - you deserved it (1356)
On 04/08/2012 at 2:55pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was cleaning the windows at work and a guy walked in so I opened the door for him. After I opened the door, he stood there with his eyes closed and his arms open. I thought he wanted a hug so I hugged him. Apparently he wanted me to spray him with Windex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13665) - you deserved it (1736)
On 04/05/2012 at 12:13am - work - by Kait - United States
Today, my wife and I went to our friend's house to play some pool. While playing, a Cicada started to fly towards my face, so I flipped my pool stick over and swatted at it with the fat end of the stick. I hit the bug. However, with the skinny side I hit myself in the snow-globes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2226) - you deserved it (4720)
On 04/04/2012 at 10:50pm - misc - by Chris (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was talking about phobias and anxiety disorders in psychology class. I nearly had a panic attack because I was worried that someone might realize I suffer from them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5753) - you deserved it (934)
On 03/29/2012 at 4:16pm - work - by nicoleee - United States
Today, I made a new friend. He seemed pretty cool, until we came to the topic of religion and the ancient alien theory. I'm seemingly now friends with a guy who thinks alien Jesus raped an Earth woman, and we're the resulting cross-breed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12736) - you deserved it (1978)
On 03/27/2012 at 3:40am - misc - by blueglover - United States (California)
Today, I was leaning over a fence in a pasture to get a closer look at something. Nobody warned my nuts that it was an electric fence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12903) - you deserved it (6481)
On 03/27/2012 at 1:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I learned a valuable lesson: Make sure you learn to swim at a very young age, or else you might end up a in a swimming class with a bunch 3 and 4 year-olds, taught by your crush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6321) - you deserved it (1538)
On 03/26/2012 at 10:51am - misc - by stupdude3 (man) - United States
Today, my mother told me it's okay to be a prostitute, as long as I make sure the clients pay a lot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16344) - you deserved it (2152)
On 03/26/2012 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Teenagegirl (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, as I was walking home from work, I became the victim of a drive-by peanutting. Yes, apparently I'm only worth a bag of nuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12258) - you deserved it (1446)
On 03/24/2012 at 9:41pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my girlfriend decided to pleasure me with a handjob. It was incredibly painful because she didn't understand that my foreskin isn't as flexible as she thought it to be. I didn't have the heart to tell her to stop until she asked, "Is it supposed to turn this color?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (6582) - you deserved it (2493)
On 03/24/2012 at 1:30am - intimacy - by purple - United States (Texas)
Today, I had to re-grade a student's assignments because neither he, nor his parents can read "Spanish." I'd written in cursive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19637) - you deserved it (2293)
On 03/22/2012 at 1:13am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, after a year of coaxing, I got my boyfriend of 18 months to agree to have sex with me. He decided his first course of action was to try to shove his flaccid penis into my unlubricated vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16589) - you deserved it (5118)
On 03/21/2012 at 3:27am - intimacy - by ReallyBro (woman) - United States (Texas)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
