About toriicylerr : Hey guys; I'm tori ;) message mee
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Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents. As he was loading his truck, I went inside to take a surreptitious shit. I ended up clogging the toilet, and so the first thing my mom said to my boyfriend was, "You'll have to find another bathroom; she just clogged it all up." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23577) - you deserved it (5395)
On 01/09/2013 at 2:57pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I found out that my daughter's "pen pal" is really a 58-year-old man in prison. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18112) - you deserved it (1818)
On 10/09/2012 at 10:59pm - kids - by ohgod. - United States (Florida)
Today, I was on a train. An elderly woman and her daughter got on, looking for a seat. The daughter suggested the one next to mine. The elderly woman looked at me and said something in Russian. I speak some Russian. She said she didn't want to "sit by the hooker." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14926) - you deserved it (2443)
On 09/18/2012 at 10:04am - misc - by dearbailee (woman) - United States
Today, I wrote the girl I love a long, gushy letter to convince her to be with me instead of her abusive ex. Later on, I asked her what she thought. She said she can't read cursive. She chose the ex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16608) - you deserved it (2565)
On 08/28/2012 at 10:16am - love - by tutusaurus - United States (California)
Today, my cheating, psycho asscricket of an ex texted me and asked me back out. I said no, and didn't think any more of it, at least until an hour later, when I looked out my window, only to see him smearing a bag of dog crap all over my porch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17258) - you deserved it (199)
On 08/14/2012 at 11:02am - love - by WELLFUCKYOUTOO (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, the man I went on a date with a few weeks ago finally called me back. I was his "one phone call" from prison. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16238) - you deserved it (1322)
On 07/23/2012 at 7:06pm - love - by Rose (woman) - United States
Today, my brother thought it would be funny to pretend my tampons were "dynamite" and run around the house throwing them at my friends and family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15306) - you deserved it (1517)
On 07/05/2012 at 12:01am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out that my husband and my cat have something in common; they both like to lick themselves. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16708) - you deserved it (1928)
On 06/19/2012 at 6:51am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20717) - you deserved it (7959)
On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)
Today, I accidentally cut myself while slicing some sponge cake. My husband's first reaction was to ask if the cake had gotten bloody or not. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14329) - you deserved it (2988)
On 04/15/2012 at 9:55am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)
Today, my roommate and I realised our freezer hasn't been working for days. This would be slightly less awful if she hadn't been storing dead rats for her pet snakes in there. Let's just say the smell is interesting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16079) - you deserved it (1694)
On 03/26/2012 at 8:28pm - animals - by damselfly (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I found out why teenage boys have "Keep out" and "Please knock" signs on their bedroom doors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7465) - you deserved it (32640)
On 03/19/2012 at 1:49am - intimacy - by ari - United States
Today, my parents dragged me along to a family soccer game. I got so bored watching a bunch of grown men practically buttfucking each other between kicking balls around the field, that I fell asleep. I woke up a few hours later to an empty field and had to walk five miles back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11788) - you deserved it (18966)
On 02/24/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by so bored -__- (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was holding my 3 year old brother, and apparently he thinks it's hilarious to pull my tank top down and scream ''BOOBS!'' in public. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24692) - you deserved it (3342)
On 02/16/2012 at 2:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives in the cakes for my son's 7th birthday party. Over 40 kids came to the party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26614) - you deserved it (2592)
On 01/25/2012 at 11:18pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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